Of Timelords And Loss

In BBC's "Dr. Who" the doctor is capable of regenerating to create a new body when either injured or emotionally spent beyond repair. This process is tied to his nature as a timelord and occurs through an increasing display of light bursting forth from within. The event is laden with strong emotion, frequently associated with immense change and always spurs a great deal of speculation by viewers as to who will emerge next. It is a singular point of meaning in the story-arc of a character possessing the capacity to exhibit new qualities of personality through resurrection. 





A recent loss in a local community, someone who amusingly and endearingly was given the title of timelord, has me reflecting on the process of regeneration and loss. I did not know this person intimately, but some of those deeply affected by her loss are good friends of mine. Regardless of the level of personal contact the loss of anyone, particularly one of such powerful passion, brings immediate emotional responses. Even after 18 years I can remember the moment I found out my grandmother had died or later when a woman I'd had my first teen crush on passed away due to labor complications. These experiences linger and their associated memories fuel the sense of loss we often try so hard to move past and instead find ourselves continuing to live in. 





Loss and grief, like any other emotions, are shared experiences, relational points of contact between the individual narratives guiding our lives and the people who we are enmeshed with. The strength of those emotions emerges from the quality and depth of the associated relationship. Not knowing someone very well personally does not generate a great sense of loss, but once the feeling of grief felt by those who were closer is contemplated upon empathy expands our emotional reaction. This is why we do not simply move on from a loss, for we are caught up in the flow of energy and information generated by all the interactions we have with countless others.





To live fully is to constantly expand our awareness through the power of our imagination fueled by our empathic connections with others. We do this by continually engaging in social activities, opening ourselves up to the inevitable change that others inspire in our lives. We do this by active, intentional, conscious deliberation, but this is only the tip of the iceberg of our mental lives. There is so much going on below that of our conscious lives, countless variables embodied in people rising and falling in the sea of our potential being. Even a momentary analysis will indicate just how often we are surprised by what arises within us. 





The life of a timelord, much like any of us, is measured by the degree of change he or she manifests in our shared reality. Perhaps rather than looking at regeneration as being required due to injury we can look at it as being the result of being filled. Like a tea-kettle or a balloon filled beyond capacity the stuff of life explodes forth in every direction remaking all that it touches.





Our lives, like the passing of a timelord, are explosions of regenerative energy. We cannot choose not to affect others, but the nature of the affect is ours to influence. Like the recent passing of a community sister, we should be so lucky to inspire the passion and love of so many. 












© David Teachout