Please, don't be a butthead.

Sad but true: I was a fat kid with not many friends, but it wasn't my husky-sized pants that made me unpopular. It was the fact that I was the class tattle-tale.

Whenever the teacher had to leave the room she would say, "Now, Ad, I want you to write down the name of everyone who misbehaves while I am gone." ... And you know what? I would actually DO it! And then I'd get the piss pounded out of me at recess.

I don't know why I was chosen for such an awful task. I'm guessing it's because I am kno...