Real Talk

Hello, internet (and real) friends -

A lot of you are getting emails from me today and you’re saying, “Holy shit, Jason’s alive!"

Yes, Jason is alive. The past six months have been a real test of my resolve. And I passed, at times, but passing just meant another set of ridiculous challenges. It has been all-consuming and all-distracting and put me in a bubble that left me to my own devices to deal with things no-one should have to deal with. 

But I’ve reached a point where things can literally only get better, and I’ve been focusing my attention back on the things that are important to me.

I have books to finish (but, thankfully, a deadline extension) and a road-trip to plan and stories to work on.

The past six months have been a learning experience, to say the least. But lately it’s been feeling like new days. There’s something special about a nadir, because when you’re sitting in a nadir you realize you’re in a nadir but you also realize you have friends and family and loved ones to the right of you who are willing to help pull you out. 

This’ll be my last emo post. The emails will continue to flow, the progress will continue to pick up. I have some great friends who are willing to help me get out of deadline blues and that’ll certainly help. The Nats are hitting again, the sun is shining, my golf game is improving. My company named me Young Engineer of the Year (it was my last year of eligibility) and, for the first time in my life, I’m not ashamed to mix day job with night job stuff. My wife and I wrote an amazing paper together that we’ll soon be publishing. Beer is still delicious, cheese is still God’s gift to humanity. Kanye released a new album and a new Thor movie will be coming out in several months.

A new status quo is all but guaranteed, because the old status quo was scorched, the ashes were salted and pissed on, and the only option left is to rebuild on a new site or give up.

And, in the nadir, giving up means becoming asymptotic to misery.

So I’ll build a new world. One to my liking and in my image. 

And I’ll still love you. I’ll always love you.