[Jenny] Cabin in the Woods Drinking Game

Tami says : This was an email sent to me by Jenny. After reading it, I couldn’t NOT beg to blog it. Enjoy!

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Horror fans really need a The Cabin in the Woods drinking game. Every time a theme from TCitW appears in the horror film you’re watching, you drink.

If such a game existed, I would be blotto. I’ve taken to watching 15-20 minutes of horror while I eat lunch. (A futile attempt to reduce the size of our Netflix queue.) At the moment, I’m slogging my way through Necrosis. Supposedly it takes place in Donner Pass, California (and yes, it’s about the ghosts of the Donner party haunting a bunch of kids trapped by a blizzard.) But it was filmed at Crater Lake, OR, so I’m enjoying the familiar scenery.

Anyways, it’s an okay movie. I’m good with it. Or, I would be — if I hadn’t seen The Cabin in the Woods. That damned film cast a pall over my shlock horror!

When the six heroes were introduced, I thought, “Jock. Slut. Virgin. Jester. Brains. Virgin. Huh. Two virgins. That’s innovative.”

They stop at a backwoods restaurant to pee before heading out into the wilderness. “Cue the Harbringer!” I mutter. A mutant-looking guy shambles out and delivers the obligatory ominous speech about their… omg. Their cabin in the woods. (Just realized that. I guess I would have had to drink twice there.)

They ignore him. (Drink) They drive up to the cabin, have some character development (drink) then go down into the basement (drink) and fiddle around with the stuff down there (drink) until they discover a mysterious old book (drink) detailing the history of the murderous rednecks (drink) that will be coming back as zombies any moment now.

Once upon a time, I would have been perfectly content with this. Now I sit there thinking, “Tequila is my LADY!!!!”

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