"When there is ‘conditional’ love based on our performance or behavior, when we become ‘domesticated’..."

“When there is ‘conditional’ love based on our performance or behavior, when we become ‘domesticated’ and are supposed to be a ‘good boy or girl,’ when our parents vicariously live their unlived lives out through our accomplishments, or when our parents unconsciously abuse their power and enact their own unhealed abuse, all ‘for our own good’ – these are all various forms of subtle but very real child abuse.”

- from the essay “Unlived Lives” by Paul Levy at Nailed (via thisisnailed)