The Value of Teachers
111 Days until TASTE TEST meets the world!
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This is a pretty old picture of Max — I think he was almost three here? Or maybe just turned three. Regardless, he doesn’t look like this anymore. He’s become such a boy — such a real, live little person. He says crazy things. He’s smarter than I am on most days. I adore him.
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Today I had a parent/teacher conference at Max’s school. Educare is technically a day care center, but it’s run like a school, with classrooms and a curriculum that follows state standards. It’s the second best thing we ever did for our son. He has absolutely blossomed at Educare. He’s become the boy he was always meant to be. Ms. Laurin, one of Max’s favorite teachers, wrote out a lovely chart to show all the ways he has improved over the last year and a half. So much has changed about my little boy, but the biggest changes or improvements are in his behavior — which takes me to the best thing we ever did for our son: put him on the Feingold Diet.
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I’ve written about Feingold before — this is the diet that’s free of additives that are artificial (colors/flavors/preservatives) and limits or eliminates foods high in salicylates (i.e. peppers, berries, cloves, apples, and others.) After a year and a half on the FG diet, Max has become the kind of child everyone dreams of having. His dairy allergy combined with the diet certainly limits his options, but we live in a world where you can get just about anything you want, from brown sugar cotton candy to dairy free Milky Way bars. Max never goes without treats. And, frankly, he’s probably the healthiest eating 5-year old I know.
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The combination of good teachers and the diet have assisted my special little man in learning greater self-control and discipline. There was a time when his tantrums were so bad, he was physically violent. He chewed on everything – clothes, buttons, his fingers, etc. He got frustrated so easily and we had to walk on eggshells to keep him happy. Now, almost every day is extraordinarily pleasent and simple. As I’m writing this, he’s watching one of his favorite movies downstairs with his uncle. He is just such a great kid. I am so blessed to have him in my life.
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Consequently, the same day that I had my conference was the day I told my students I wasn’t coming back next year. I think the reaction was mixed between disappointment and surprise and general apathy — I mean, really, you can’t expect everyone to care where you go, right? It felt good to hear that I’d be missed. Sometimes I doubt my impact on my students. I care about them a lot, but one thing I’ve really learned is that sometimes the personal connection is more important than the curriculum. Don’t get me wrong — we read Beowulf and Macbeth and Animal Farm. We tick the boxes of what’s required, always. But I like that I can laugh with them and we tease each other. I like that we’re friendly and it’s a happy place. I guess I just feel like you shouldn’t have to do away with the simple pleasure of enjoying the company of others for the sake of learning. Doesn’t learning require an open mind? Doesn’t an open mind need a safe, accepting place to exist at all?
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Which brings me back to my conference with Ms. Laurin — like me, she and the other teachers provided that personal connection to my son. It’s great that he knows his letters and numbers. It’s great that he’s writing words and spelling them, too. But, frankly, the emotional connection is far more valuable to me. His first two years were with a childcare provider/neighbor who was literally like a second mom. Leaving her was intensely hard. Then we spent two more years in a hellacious situation where Max was judged and mistreated. It created more negative behaviors than I could have possibly anticipated. So once we found Educare and the teachers began to love, really love, my son, I knew that this– this connection — is the most important thing about teaching. The learning is great. But the love is what lasts the longest.
