Overcoming Fear: 5 Fears that Hold Us Back in Life
We all fear something: spiders, heights, public speaking. These fears can be inconvenient and certainly burdensome, but they do not normally hold us back in life or business. I call these fears “fears with faces” because in most cases we recognize them and are willing to discuss them.
The fears that are the most destructive in our lives I refer to as “faceless fears”. I refer to them this way because many times they are not obvious to us. Many times we will not be honest and admit to ourselves that they exist and sometimes they are buried so deeply in our subconscious that their destruction in our lives is tantamount to guerrilla warfare against our lives and overcoming fear is much more difficult.
“Faceless fears” hold us back from moving forward in our careers and our lives in general. They can, unconsciously, cause us to undermine our efforts to be successful and happy. And, it is quite possible to live our whole lives under the oppression of these faceless tyrants.
Overcoming Fear: 5 Fears That Hold Us Back In Life
1. Fear of Failure
It is not uncommon to not want to fail at our endeavors but we must not allow the fear of failing to stop us from trying. Failure is subjective in each person’s mind. Once when my son was playing Little League baseball there were two outs and his team was down by one run and the bases were loaded. To the devastation of an overzealous father he struck out. I went over to console him and said something to the effect about not feeling bad because he struck out and was the last batter. He said, “I wasn’t the last batter there were guys behind me they just didn’t get a chance to bat.”
If we can reframe our view of failure and look at setbacks differently, we can unshackle our lives and open up vast opportunities to ourselves by overcoming fear.
2. Fear of Success
If there is one fear that is the most challenging and hardest to face up to it is the fear of success. Few of us will admit to it and even fewer are willing to discuss this issue. We could probably substitute “deserving” for “fear”. I believe that many individuals just don’t believe they are deserving of being successful.
Poor self-image issues are difficult to uncover and even more difficult to face up to. Many times, these issues stem from real or unreal perceptions that have been with us since childhood. Poor self-image can be overcome; it takes time, honesty with one’s self and sometimes, professional help.
3. Fear of Rejection
Let’s be honest, no one likes to be rejected. It starts when we are young – you go to the junior high dance and stand in the corner. Why? We are sure if we ask a girl to dance we will be told no, so we don’t ask.
This fear is particularly devastating if you are in sales, but it can truly affect any career. The fear of not wanting to express yourself for fear of being ridiculed can hamper growth in any job.
The key to overcoming fear in this instance is to try and understand why someone may be rejecting you or your idea. Most times it has nothing to do with you personally, they may not understand, not be interested or have their own issues they are dealing with at the moment. Once we understand that and we can deal with the “no” on a less personal basis we can move forward.
4. Fear of Loss
One thing I have learned in my life is that as my career has moved forward I have had to leave certain things behind. To gain in life most times you have to give something up. Most of the time these things are not good for you but most of us don’t like giving anything up, good or bad.
It is important that we realize in order to grow, what we will gain in most cases is much better than what we give up. It helps to look at it as a trade instead of a loss, a trade that will enrich our lives.
5. Fear of Change
One of the most difficult actions for any individual to do is change. Change comes with uncertainty and difficulty. For many individuals, changes can only take place with both physical as well as emotional struggle. These struggles can be magnified by the uncertainty that change can in fact take place in our lives.
The major step in overcoming fear of change is making the decision that we want to change and understanding that change will affect our lives positively.
Overcoming fear of any type is not easy. It takes courage, willpower and persistence. The first step is recognizing that we have fear and wanting to unburden ourselves. We can all enrich our lives by taking these first steps in conquering our fears.
Good Selling,
Bob
Image courtesy of imagerymajestic / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
