How to Describe Moving Body Parts
Are they dancing or fighting?
No, you can’t simply say mouth. When you look at someone’s face, their mouth (or eyes, or noses–you understand) do stuff. They twitch, glow, wrinkle, any number of movements that as an author, will add detail and intrigue to your story, as well as define your character. Here’s a list I’ve culled from books I read. As with all of these lists, don’t use them verbatim; adjust them with your author’s voice, to suit your situations.
And, add your own in the comment section. Share with the rest of the community:
Voice/Words
His voice trailed off; the conclusions was inescapable
Spoke in a hoarse whisper
Said with weary resignation
Hollow voice
Voice low and gravely
Voice thick with conviction, guilt, etc
She asked between bites of calamari
Voice cracked and raw
Speaking in quiet tones
Hadn’t realized she was holding her breath
Breathy explosion of words
Tone weary, but cheerful
He dropped into topics she cared passionately about, but she didn’t comment
He wondered briefly
Segued to a different topic,
Voice low, tone uncertain
Something like a sigh
Words were slurred and lisping
Mouth turned up a fraction of an inch
Spittle on his lips
his grammar and syntax were good
She digressed
His voice hardened as he spoke
Her words seemed to lead me close, in hopes I’d provide my own answers
The comment wasn’t a question
His thin voice took on a pedantic tone
The babble of talk died at his entry. He blinked as his eyes adjusted.
I sense a but coming
Meaningless gibberish
Breath came in ragged gasps
Anger crept into his voice
Bark out critical info in short sharp yelps
Tight-lipped
Looked left and right before starting
Sam waited until he grunted back
Elvis fished his name out of the fog of conversation
Eyes/Brows
brow puckered
Raised his right eyebrow
Deep-seated anxiety
General
gnawing at her soul like a rodent’s teeth
Heard little and cared less
Hovering over her shoulder
He waited for me to speak
Stomach heaved
Wave of nausea
her heartache had gone numb
Something nagged at the edge of his consciousness
waiting, he had time to decide that if
Some unconscious process forced him to shut down, let his mind go blank, and work on a problem
Waited through another lengthy silence, my mind flooding with questions
seemed about to speak, but the thread eluded him
Head
Practiced friendly nod
It occurred to him, in the last functioning part of his brain
Muscle in his right cheek flexed
temple twitched
Shook his head and turned back
Headaches (a favorite of mine)
It all made her head ache
A headache flared
The headache, a familiar electric pain behind his eyes
A throbbing headache was developing beneath his temples
Living with her headache
My headache had returned
Thrumming/buzzing/purring/vibrating/drumming headache behind her temples
She winced, brows furrowed tight with pain
A needling headache behind his right ear
The rhythm of blood throbbing in my temple
Skull pounding
Stick hot needles in her eyes
She finally got to the edge of her headache
Head felt like it was filled with straw
Hands/Arms
hands shaking in a palsy of rage
Hands clamped tightly together, leaning forward, knuckles white
His hands crossed in front of him
That fast-wave women do
shook like the wings of a hummingbird, fingers tightly intertwined
knuckle cracking
flapped a hand
Folded his arms across his chest
Soft handshake
Firm, manly handshakes
Steepled her fingers
elbows resting on his knees
locked arms
Face
Worry lines framed her mouth and tugged at her eyes
Forced a smile
her dead mother smiled across the gulf of time
Long face pensive and worried
His grimace that of a man who’s bitten into a moldy plum
Tears started again without sound or movement
Smile faded from his face
Tepid smile
Grit his teeth
Stubborn set of his jaw revealed that he was a dangerous man to cross
Scratched his cheek
His face hardened in concentration
Thinking about my conversation with the old detective
skin on the back of his neck puckered
muscles in his jaw bunched
muscles at the back of her neck tightened
fluffed the hair at the back of her neck when she was thinking
Eyes
Vision narrowed to a pinprick
eyes locked on like magnets
studied her with a predator’s unwavering attention
blinked a couple of times
Squinted out into the audience
eyes narrowed to slits
Narrowed his eyes
eyes locked in a shared understanding
yellow rimmed eyes narrowing
eyes turned inward
peer sightlessly at a wall
Staring sightlessly into the darkness
Stared into the distance
Fixed expression
Looked at a place somewhere over his shoulder
Their eyes met, but he broke it off
meaningful eye contact
risked a peek
she screwed her eyes shut
stared brazenly into her eyes
opened her eyes wide
dark eyes radiated a fierce, uncompromising intelligence
stared through him
focused on an empty space in the air between them
looked for a common theme, a thread of some sort
She frowned–couldn’t recall the incident
For more descriptors for characters and settings, click here.
Jacqui Murray is the author of the popular Building a Midshipman , the story of her daughter’s journey from high school to United States Naval Academy. She is webmaster for six blogs, an Amazon Vine Voice book reviewer, a columnist for Examiner.com and TeachHUB, Editorial Review Board member for Journal for Computing Teachers, Cisco guest blogger, Technology in Education featured blogger, and IMS tech expert. She is the editor of a K-6 technology curriculum, K-8 keyboard curriculum, K-6 Digital Citizenship curriculum, creator of technology training books for middle school and ebooks on technology in education. Currently, she’s editing a thriller that should be out to publishers next summer. Contact Jacqui at her writing office or her tech lab, Ask a Tech Teacher.
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