V is for Valentine, My Deadly

 

My Deadly Valentine was the sixth STAC Mystery to be released under the Crooked Cat imprint, and it’s a little different from the others.

It’s the shortest, a shade shy of 50,000 words. The action takes place entirely within the fictitious town of Sanford in West Yorkshire, and it has the distinction of being the first STAC Mystery to break into the UK Kindle Crime, Thriller and Mystery/British Detectives top 100 on the day of its release.

The launch presented us with problems, too. We wanted it out there before Valentine’s Day to give buyers a chance to have it in place on the Kindle for the actual day, but my wife and were on holiday in Spain, and we didn’t get home until February 4th. To further complicate matters, Laurence and Steph Patterson, the husband wife team behind Crooked Cat, were going away on the 7th of February (as I recall). We eventually decided upon Wednesday, February 6th, and still in holiday mode, I recollect it being one of the most tiring launches.

The tale differs markedly from other STAC Mysteries. We get a look into Joe’s private life, his loneliness and his search for female companionship. Worse than that, when serial killer, the Sanford Valentine Strangler strikes again, Joe doesn’t have far to look for the major suspect. It’s him.

If you want to know more, you’ll have to read it, but here’s an extract and Joe is trying to persuade Brenda that she should put out feelers for him with the woman he wants to date.

It was three thirty in the afternoon, and the Lazy Luncheonette was ready for closing. Lee had left at two, the cleaning was done, and the three remaining crew were settled for their customary last cup of tea of the day.

“Faint heart never won fair maid, Joe,” Sheila pointed out.

“Cut the clichés,” he retorted. “Come on, Brenda, you know me. I’m not good with women.”

Sheila almost dropped her cup. “You didn’t waste any time with Melanie Markham over New Year.”

“She hit on me,” Joe pointed out. “Aw, come on, Brenda, all I’m asking is that you ask Letty for a date on my behalf. Break the ice for me.”

“I’ll break a bit more than ice,” Brenda threatened. “You never have a problem speaking to total strangers when they come in the café, do you? I’ve never heard such rudeness.”

“That’s business. And I don’t think walking up to Letty and saying, ‘you’re a rough looking old sow, but you’ll do for Valentine’s Night’, is gonna get me very far.”

“She’s not rough looking,” Sheila pointed out. “In fact, she’s quite pretty.”

Joe took another mouthful of tea and sighed. “I didn’t mean it literally. What I’m saying is I need to be a bit more tactful with her than I am with the customers, and me and tact are not always the best of friends.”

“Tact and I,” Sheila corrected him.

“Oh, I should say you’re a lot more tactful than me, Sheila.” Joe grinned at her.

She tutted and looked up at the ceiling as if seeking divine inspiration. She, too, drank from her beaker. “What is this sudden need for female companionship?”

Brenda guffawed. “Mid-life crisis… about fifteen years too late, I reckon. He’s feeling his oats, isn’t he? Ever since Melanie, he’s been hankering after some more action.”

“Not far off the mark,” Joe agreed. “Look, I’ve been on my own since Alison left, and that’s, what? Ten years? Is there something wrong with wanting a woman in my life again?”

“Nothing,” Brenda agreed. “Go for it, Joe, but go for it on your own, don’t ask me to do your matchmaking.”

“You have more experience than me, Brenda.”

She stared sharply at him. “What?”

“You’ve had more men than Sanford Main Pit when it was running on three shifts, and…”

“You’re walking dangerously close to the edge, Joe Murray. Be careful you don’t fall off.”

***

My Deadly Valentine is available as a paperback and as an e-book download in all formats, or direct from Crooked Cat Books in MOBI, EPUB and PDF formats