America the Tootiful: We brag even when we're not very good

Here's an advance look at my next The Life Well-Led column in the Mensa publication, The Intelligencer.




America the Tootiful


America
loves to toot its own horn, even when we're not very good. For example, after
the Boston Bombing, President Obama crowed about how great America is:




The
terrorists failed because, as Americans, we refused to be terrorized...That
American spirit includes staying true to the unity and diversity that makes us
strong -- like no other nation in the world.




Huh?! The terrorists didn't fail: Despite America having
spent billions on anti-terrorism, the terrorists accomplished just what they
wanted: They disrupted that iconic American sporting event The Boston Marathon,
killing three, wounding hundreds, and spawning a manhunt that has already cost
all of us billions
of dollars. And did we truly react "like no other nation in the world?"
Does Obama really believe that not one of the world's 196 nations could even
match our unsuccessful effort?




Our undeserved horn-tooting
descends from there. Examples:




In the most recent presidential
election, both candidates fell over themselves to genuflect before the altar of
American exceptionalism despite, for example, the U.S.'s
child poverty rate ranking 34th
among the most advanced 35 countries, edging out only Romania. But
don't worry, we rank
#2 in beer consumption. Politico reported,
"The President took American exceptionalism to a whole new level Wednesday
by suggesting that not only is the United States the greatest nation
on Earth, but every other country wants to be us." But even that pales in
comparison with Romney's view, which the Huffington Post summarized
as, "God chose the U.S.
above all the nations of the Earth to bring light, hope, and freedom to all
humankind."




Of course, politicians far from
monopolize the gasconade.




According to a panel of experts
convened at Columbia College (IL), Michael Jackson is widely
referred to as a genius. Michael Jackson, a consensus genius??! 




As a career counselor, I can
attest that the amount of puffery in job seekers' resumes, cover letters, and
interviews could fill a dirigible: "I'm uniquely qualified for the job.
I'm a self-starter yet also a team player who delights in exceeding customer
expectations, and I spearheaded initiatives that saved the company $10
million." If you added up all the savings job seekers claimed, it would
exceed the Gross Domestic Product.




Of course, product marketers know
absolutely no bounds. For example, Here's how Pom Wonderful pomegranate juice has been promoted: "This 'antioxidant superpower' is straight-up 'health in a
bottle' that’ll help you cheat death with
beneficial effects on everything from prostate cancer to cardiovascular health to
impotence." In fact, Time
reported, "The FTC says there is no science to back up the claims. The
results of studies that have been done show that Pom products show no more
efficacy than a placebo."




"Wonderful" is downright
modest compared with, for example, a kitchen cleaner named Fantastik! not to mention  the makeup, Super Orgasm .




Even the world of theatre, where stage
plays relentlessly assault capitalism, can't resist its unwarranted
horn-tooting when it comes to lining their
pockets. For example, Berkeley's pricey Aurora Theatre's
current play is The Arsonists. Its promo: "See what everyone's talking
about!" I live heavily in the Bay Area theatre scene. Not one person has
mentioned The Arsonists.




A decade ago, the company that
made the two-wheel Segway promised it would revolutionize travel. When was the
last time you saw a Segway? Perhaps the revolution was impeded because its CEO
James Heselden died when his Segway accidentally rolled off a cliff.




From whence stems America's
bloviation? One likely suspect is America's obsession with building people's
self-esteem. We praise them or certainly don't criticize them for bragging
about attributes they've acquired without effort: "Black is
Beautiful," I'm Italian and I'm Proud," Girls Rock." Such
phrases are no mere sideshows: A Google search on "Girls rock" revealed
3.4 million hits (and only 0.9 million for "Boys Rock" but I'll leave
the reasons for the disparity for another column.) Ironically, studies find
that Asians have the lowest average self-esteem and the highest achievement while
Blacks have the highest self-esteem and the lowest achievement. That makes
sense: If you think you're already wonderful, you're less likely to feel the
need to work hard.




Sure, when it's exigent, we may
feign modesty. After all, humility is core to America's New Testament roots:
"I accept this honor not just on behalf of myself but of my colleagues, friends,
and family without whom this wouldn't be possible. It truly was a team
effort." Not withstanding such calculated understatement, we are America the
Tootiful.




I cannot claim that every word
that has emerged from my lips or fingers rises to sainthood but I write this
column in hopes it might encourage us to pull on ropes of restraint and become
a little less tootiful. It is key to
the life well-led.