Knuckle Barnacles

"Mama, do barnacles grow on knuckles?"

Huh?  I looked at my eight-year-old son, completely perplexed as to why he would ask me such a question.  "Bubba, barnacles are sea creatures that grow on hard things, like shells and shipwrecks."

"But, Mama, SpongeBob had barnacles growing on his toes!"

I knew this would have something to do with SpongeBob.  (He's an obnoxious sponge cartoon character, in case you didn't know.)  "Bubba, that's a cartoon.  It's not for real."

He grinned.  "Do you want to know how to get rid of barnacles that are growing on your toes?"

I didn't realize I had barnacles growing on my toes, but I went along with it. "Um, sure, Bubba.  Tell me how to get rid of the barnacles that are growing on my toes."

"Drink coffee."

Oh. 

So ladies and gentlemen, if you have barnacles growing on your toes, or knuckles, or any other body part, be sure to drink a nice hot cup of coffee.  You'll be barnacle-free in no time!