Dr. No-no-no-no-no!

Believe it or not, I found something fun to blog about–I know, you’re shocked!

Anyway, so Hubby has been glomming his way through James Bond movies while he works because it helps keep him awake when he’s pushing mad deadlines. So, he’s watching “Dr. No” and comes to this scene where Bond is getting into bed and is all set to get him some–miraculously–alone time to sleep. Imagine his surprise when there is not a bed-bunny but a bed-tarantula crawling up his leg.

So begins the spine-tingling music as this slow ass spider makes it’s way carefully up his moderately contoured body.

Dahhh-dah-dah-dah! Daaahhhh-dah-dah-dah!

Ever so still, Bond–in a cold sweat, mind you, and who can blame him? Haven’t you SEEN “Arachniphobia”??–waits until the spider crawls up to his shoulder and finally onto the pillow next to his head. As soon as the spider gets four of its legs onto the pillow and all of them off his shoulder, Bond does what we all would do in this situation.

He got the fuck off the bed.

He was not cool.

He was not collected.

He scrambled off that bed like it had lice, VD and old women on it, skidding the floor, all but screaming as he grabbed a shoe and slapped that spider like a bad pancake. Complete with “dramatic” movie music to make it manly instead of the panicked attack of a ten year old girl.

Which is about when Hubby and I laughed like old witches. I know, I’m horrible and you can bet your ass if I woke up with a tarantula crawling up my body, the scene would have not been nearly so calm upon the discovery. I had a roach climb up on my face once from a wall behind me. I slapped myself so hard by reflex the bug was actually stunned when it slapped the ground and my face was red for hours. But I’m not James Bond, lol.

Hubby surmises that perhaps Sean Connery was simply not able to make escaping a big hairy spider look cool simply because NO ONE can make that cool. Or possibly, “Maybe he’d never seen one before? I mean, really, how many tarantulas can they HAVE in Scotland??” He did wonder too, if possibly, Connery’s real reaction was editing from the movie. Maybe something like, “Whathefookisda??”

I guess the world will never know…

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