Ask Shallon: Why Doesn’t My Crush Like Me When I’m SO MUCH BETTER Than The Girl He Does Like?!

Ask Shallon: How to Get Over Your Crush Ask Shallon: Do Flirty Texts Mean She...

Ask Shallon: Why Doesn’t My Crush Like Me When I’m SO MUCH BETTER Than The Girl He Does Like?!

I am, like, the worst blogger ever. I know this. But that doesn’t mean I don’t care. I’m just too lazy to do anything about it, usually.

I suck.

BUT, I’m gonna tryyyyy to answer way more of your questions. I’m also writing an advice column for the rad GURL.com called Straight Talk With Shallon that answers Qs from my AskShallon@gmail.com account, so keep those questions comin’! In the meantime, whatever I can’t address there I’ll try to blog here.

So! Yes! Question!

Hi Shallon,

I’m in grade 7 and there’s a guy I really like. We are friends so we talk a lot and we text each other a lot too. I wasn’t really sure if he liked me back so I asked my friend. It turns out he likes a really bratty girl. He’s never actually had a conversation with her, he just based it on looks. I don’t understand why he wouldn’t like me when he said he trusts me. I don’t know how to move on from him. Please help.

–Mira

A very similar situation: a guy who can do SO MUCH BETTER

My Mighty Confused Mira

This is the thing with rejection–it doesn’t matter why. It really doesn’t. You will make yourself INSANE trying to figure out whyyyyy WHY WHY WHY doesn’t he want you when you are OBVIOUSLY so superior. And even if he turned up at your door with a list of reasons why he’s chosen The Skank over you, it wouldn’t make you feel better. I know this because it actually happened to me–I convinced a guy to explain, in agonizing detail, why he was leaving me for a stripper. Literally a stripper. And boy did he ever. And boy was it awful.

WHO would ditch Brandi for Leann?! It will never be understood and Brandi will waste her time trying to figure it out

But, if you’re reeeeaaaally looking for an answer, it could be that you’re too available. Available = not dateable. Boys LOVE the unknown. They love is at much as we hate it. We want to know know know KNOW if a guy likes us. They don’t actually want to know right up front if a girl likes them. They like the chase. They like to be frustrated. Everything we hate, they thrive on. It’s infuriating. So he’s known you for years–exactly the problem. He knows you. There’s nothing left to discover (or so he sees it, bc he’s an idiot). But The Skank is all sorts of interesting. Even her bratty attitude is intriguing. There’s something about a bitchy girl that reminds guys of sex. To them, bitch = sex. Don’t ask me why.

See what I mean?

I have a serious boyfriend and even now, I have to play a little bit hard to get. I’m not instantly answering texts. I’m not always down to hang out. I do my own thing. And he sweats me. Unfortunately, with so much history between you too, it’s kind of a lost cause to play hard to get now. He sees you as Just a Friend (again bc he’s an idiot) and it’s nearly impossible to change a guy’s mind on that front.

So. Getting over him.

The surest sign that a boy isn’t worthy is that he doesn’t love you. Think about it. I know a guy is quality when he has the good sense to ADORE me. If your crush had an ounce of good taste, he’d choose you over The Skank. But he doesn’t. And you can’t chance a person’s preferences. I’ve tried. Boy have I tried. And boy was it awful.

Remember this nightmare? My crush on Brody Jenner ended when he revealed himself to have such bad taste, he'd date AVRIL LAVIGNE. Shudder.

Make a list of all the things you kind of really don’t like about him. Maybe he’s short, or a ginger or smells kind of rank after gym class or writes like a serial killer. Whatever it is, write it down, tell your friends and make them remind you when you get sad. And STOP TALKING TO HIM. Don’t torture yourself. Who cares if he’s like “Um WTF”? Who cares?? Protect your heart, not his. He’s not your friend. You have other friends. And they are females.