Soundbites Contest for The General and the Horse-Lord!
Sound Bites from The General and the Horse-Lord- pick your favorite!
Tell me the quote you like and why for a chance to win a copy of the book, out Apr 5 from Dreamspinner!
(1)“You’re saying you want me to shoot you in the head if the bad guys are closing in?”
(2) “I did jerk off to a picture of an Apache attack helo when I was in high school.”
(3) “The entire world can’t stop work to brainstorm with their dicks in their hands, fun as that might be.”
(4) “I am the king. You’re the knight sitting at my round table. That’s the nature of our relationship when it comes to war or other conflict resolution in this family.”
(5) “All you want to do when you’re fourteen is snatch up a broadsword and hack something to pieces, then find a big rock and fuck it to death.”
(6) ‘Another sausage! And bring one for my friend!’.”
(7) “Sometimes I go out into the garage for some private dance time. Anything to keep from going mad.”
(8) “…don’t tell me how I need to follow your Greenpeace PETA pacifist butt into a gay bar…”
(9) Other than the tequila, there was nothing in his stomach besides Pepto-Bismol.
(10) “What was the point of throwing the wok?”
(11) “You left last night before the Kitty Cats did their Elvis medley!”
Tell me the quote you like and why for a chance to win a copy of the book, out Apr 5 from Dreamspinner!
(1)“You’re saying you want me to shoot you in the head if the bad guys are closing in?”
(2) “I did jerk off to a picture of an Apache attack helo when I was in high school.”
(3) “The entire world can’t stop work to brainstorm with their dicks in their hands, fun as that might be.”
(4) “I am the king. You’re the knight sitting at my round table. That’s the nature of our relationship when it comes to war or other conflict resolution in this family.”
(5) “All you want to do when you’re fourteen is snatch up a broadsword and hack something to pieces, then find a big rock and fuck it to death.”
(6) ‘Another sausage! And bring one for my friend!’.”
(7) “Sometimes I go out into the garage for some private dance time. Anything to keep from going mad.”
(8) “…don’t tell me how I need to follow your Greenpeace PETA pacifist butt into a gay bar…”
(9) Other than the tequila, there was nothing in his stomach besides Pepto-Bismol.
(10) “What was the point of throwing the wok?”
(11) “You left last night before the Kitty Cats did their Elvis medley!”
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5 is my favorite! That definitely sounds like what a fourteen year old guy would think... and I just can't get the image out of my head!!
(2) “I did jerk off to a picture of an Apache attack helo when I was in high school.”Helicopters are sexy ;)
(5) “All you want to do when you’re fourteen is snatch up a broadsword and hack something to pieces, then find a big rock and fuck it to death.”I like it just because it's funny. Sounds like how a teenage boy would act.
I like 5 and 3 the best! I like the young man and his dick references. It really is a profound thing.
I like the sound of 8 - a healthy dose of snark right there. :)
Oh I kind of like them all and feel like the one with the Apache helicopter should win...
(5) “All you want to do when you’re fourteen is snatch up a broadsword and hack something to pieces, then find a big rock and fuck it to death.”It tickles my funny bone. It just seems so out there (i.e. out of the moment).
(8) “…don’t tell me how I need to follow your Greenpeace PETA pacifist butt into a gay bar…”Just sums up a view of a character!
Definitely Number 3 because it made me laugh the hardest.
As a cat purrson & an Elvis admirer I like(11) “You left last night before the Kitty Cats did their Elvis medley!” best.Mindy :)
Birdsooong@comcast.net
Well, I love them all but5) is perfection. That is a 14 years old boy personified.
7) speaks to me personally. Who doesn't need private dance time?
8) just cracks me up to no end.
Can wait to read this book.
They are all good but number 5 is so like what my 4 sons were as teens I have to go with that :D
Maddie wrote: "5 is my favorite! That definitely sounds like what a fourteen year old guy would think... and I just can't get the image out of my head!!"
our babies suddenly think they're cast members of A Game of Thrones!
our babies suddenly think they're cast members of A Game of Thrones!
MandyM wrote: "(2) “I did jerk off to a picture of an Apache attack helo when I was in high school.”
Helicopters are sexy ;)"
yes, very sexy, and helo pilots even more!
Helicopters are sexy ;)"
yes, very sexy, and helo pilots even more!
Penumbra wrote: "(5) “All you want to do when you’re fourteen is snatch up a broadsword and hack something to pieces, then find a big rock and fuck it to death.”
I like it just because it's funny. Sounds like how ..."
it is how they act- I nearly didn't make it out of year 14 with my sanity!
I like it just because it's funny. Sounds like how ..."
it is how they act- I nearly didn't make it out of year 14 with my sanity!
Lauraadriana wrote: "I like 5 and 3 the best! I like the young man and his dick references. It really is a profound thing."
for some reason I flashed on a picture of Google World Headquarters when I wrote that line-
for some reason I flashed on a picture of Google World Headquarters when I wrote that line-
Leanne wrote: "I like the sound of 8 - a healthy dose of snark right there. :)"
that debate was getting a little heated--
that debate was getting a little heated--
Mina wrote: "As a cat purrson & an Elvis admirer I like(11) “You left last night before the Kitty Cats did their Elvis medley!” best.
Mindy :)
Birdsooong@comcast.net"
The Kitty Cats are Du-Wop Drag Queens who sing to support the victims of intimate partner violence--!!
Mindy :)
Birdsooong@comcast.net"
The Kitty Cats are Du-Wop Drag Queens who sing to support the victims of intimate partner violence--!!
Melanie wrote: "Well, I love them all but
5) is perfection. That is a 14 years old boy personified.
7) speaks to me personally. Who doesn't need private dance time?
8) just cracks me up to no end.
Can wait to r..."
When the guy next door gets up and gets on his treadmill, I get up and close the blinds for a little private dance time. U2 this week. And Bob Seger. And always a bit of Super Freak!
5) is perfection. That is a 14 years old boy personified.
7) speaks to me personally. Who doesn't need private dance time?
8) just cracks me up to no end.
Can wait to r..."
When the guy next door gets up and gets on his treadmill, I get up and close the blinds for a little private dance time. U2 this week. And Bob Seger. And always a bit of Super Freak!
Karl wrote: "Definitely Number 3 because it made me laugh the hardest."
I hope people reading it think this book is funny- my kid tells me I'm not as funny as I think I am. ?? How can that be?
I hope people reading it think this book is funny- my kid tells me I'm not as funny as I think I am. ?? How can that be?
blub wrote: "(5) “All you want to do when you’re fourteen is snatch up a broadsword and hack something to pieces, then find a big rock and fuck it to death.”
It tickles my funny bone. It just seems so out ther..."
I bet they all have broadswords hidden in their bedrooms
It tickles my funny bone. It just seems so out ther..."
I bet they all have broadswords hidden in their bedrooms
Urbanista wrote: "(8) “…don’t tell me how I need to follow your Greenpeace PETA pacifist butt into a gay bar…”
Just sums up a view of a character!"
Kim is kind of a smart ass kid- after his Uncle John said this to him, he got the line printed on a tee shirt--
Just sums up a view of a character!"
Kim is kind of a smart ass kid- after his Uncle John said this to him, he got the line printed on a tee shirt--
Sarah wrote: "Kim is kind of a smart ass kid- after his Uncle said this to him, he got the line printed on a tee"Lol, a kid after my own heart! Okay, I have to read him now, for sure! We can trade Greenpeace stickers! :)
(9) Other than the tequila, there was nothing in his stomach besides Pepto-Bismol I love this line. Cracks me up.
arli_boo@yahoo.com
Arlisa wrote: "(9) Other than the tequila, there was nothing in his stomach besides Pepto-Bismol
I love this line. Cracks me up.
arli_boo@yahoo.com"
I have to tell you, this is my favorite. I've been in that condition before, tequila and Pepto Bismol
I love this line. Cracks me up.
arli_boo@yahoo.com"
I have to tell you, this is my favorite. I've been in that condition before, tequila and Pepto Bismol
I love them all, truly, but this one probably cracked me up the most.11) “You left last night before the Kitty Cats did their Elvis medley!”
I just had that visual of several Kitties cracking up the chocolate in that commercial.
I really liked this one. (4) “I am the king. You’re the knight sitting at my round table. That’s the nature of our relationship when it comes to war or other conflict resolution in this family.”
Simply because how sweet it sounds on how they depend on another. LOL
Thank you for the contest!!
Dumbledore11214 wrote: "I love them all, truly, but this one probably cracked me up the most.
11) “You left last night before the Kitty Cats did their Elvis medley!”
I just had that visual of several Kitties cracking u..."
I had fun writing the list of Elvis songs for the medley!
11) “You left last night before the Kitty Cats did their Elvis medley!”
I just had that visual of several Kitties cracking u..."
I had fun writing the list of Elvis songs for the medley!
Judianna wrote: "I really liked this one.
(4) “I am the king. You’re the knight sitting at my round table. That’s the nature of our relationship when it comes to war or other conflict resolution in this family.”
..."
thank you for playing! And they are sweet- it seems easy to me to write characters that love each other-
(4) “I am the king. You’re the knight sitting at my round table. That’s the nature of our relationship when it comes to war or other conflict resolution in this family.”
..."
thank you for playing! And they are sweet- it seems easy to me to write characters that love each other-
This may double-post, since the site is acting up on me. I like "What was the point of throwing the wok?" You know it's not an aerodynamically-sound projectile because of the shape, so some mishap must have followed. Plus, a lifetime of watching THE MUPPET SHOW has led to my love of random, crazy things being thrown...
it was a Muppet Show moment for sure!
okay, we have our winners! Maddie and Koozebane, yipee! I'll be in touch through the email here about how to get your book.
Thanks for playing, guys. This was fun!
Thanks for playing, guys. This was fun!
Yep, it's the wok (10) “What was the point of throwing the wok?” for me too, in large part because that actually happened a few years ago. I was late from arriving to a shindig where I'd promised to cook some mock chinese, and I'd ordered the guys to chop the vegetables ahead. A friend had decided to start cooking, in all eager helpfulness of course, but the thing is he can't cook for *shit, but he has this "idea of cooking" that all you need is to be a little creative. So when I arrive I find this curious green goo with rock like little brown things boiling away in my wok. I sort of snapped and threw the wok out of the window. Yes, I have my moments, but 1) it was totally unedible 2) I was going to have to start cooking from scratch 3) what the hell was the green goo? We did have a hysterically fun time and I think the whole goo thing just added to it.
I know I'm late, but I was going to buy the book anyway, I just wanted to join in :D
Pushubuu wrote: "Yep, it's the wok (10) “What was the point of throwing the wok?” for me too, in large part because that actually happened a few years ago. I was late from arriving to a shindig where I'd promised t..."
if there is a wok in the middle of a crisis, naturally you want to throw it!
I like the 'idea of cooking' --I'm going to explore the 'idea of cleaning the house' today.
if there is a wok in the middle of a crisis, naturally you want to throw it!
I like the 'idea of cooking' --I'm going to explore the 'idea of cleaning the house' today.
“…don’t tell me how I need to follow your Greenpeace PETA pacifist butt into a gay bar…”I've just seen now the contest...
I like (8) because I'm a Greenpeace PETA pacifist myself ;-). Well, maybe leave out the PETA part: I'm all in favor of treating animals decently, but I don't particularly like PETA.
While several of those were really funny, I chose number 1: You're saying you want me to shoot you in the head if the bad guys are closing in?, because I tried to imagine that conversation and that situation and failed. XD
Antonella wrote: "“…don’t tell me how I need to follow your Greenpeace PETA pacifist butt into a gay bar…”
I've just seen now the contest...
I like (8) because I'm a Greenpeace PETA pacifist myself ;-). Well, mayb..."
it is sort of a sweet phrase to throw at someone in the middle of an argument!
I've just seen now the contest...
I like (8) because I'm a Greenpeace PETA pacifist myself ;-). Well, mayb..."
it is sort of a sweet phrase to throw at someone in the middle of an argument!
Lady*M wrote: "While several of those were really funny, I chose number 1: You're saying you want me to shoot you in the head if the bad guys are closing in?, because I tried to imagine that conversation and that..."
Hi, Lady M- soldiers, you know- their own deaths are their ace up the sleeve- one step further for the greater good than most people will take. I hope you like the story!
Hi, Lady M- soldiers, you know- their own deaths are their ace up the sleeve- one step further for the greater good than most people will take. I hope you like the story!
I admit up front this is weird, but #6 immediately made me flash on that scene from the movie Barfly in which Mickey Rourke's character is in his favorite tavern and slurringly calls out, "Drinks for all my friends!" (I know, I know. But replace "drinks" with "sausages" and it's funny. To me, anyway. I love that movie.)These are all great lines, by the way. And you don't have to enter me in the drawing, 'cause I'll probably buy the book.
K.Z. wrote: "I admit up front this is weird, but #6 immediately made me flash on that scene from the movie Barfly in which Mickey Rourke's character is in his favorite tavern and slurringly calls out, "Drinks f..."
I love Mickey Rourke, so much talent, and he sort of runs from it, like it's a wild horse. And there was lots of beer involved in that sausage line!
I love Mickey Rourke, so much talent, and he sort of runs from it, like it's a wild horse. And there was lots of beer involved in that sausage line!
Sarah wrote: "And there was lots of beer involved in that sausage line!"But of course! Beer and sausage go together. Ask any German. ;-)
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