If the Writing Doesn’t Kill You

Photo by Dave Pearson via Creative Commons

Honestly, I should know better. For weeks now, I’ve been pushing myself to finish my zombie novel, get a book cover designed and schedule time on my editor’s calendar in order to publish this thing by Summer 2013. And you know what? I’m exhausted!

It really hit me last Friday. My wife sensed it when I would stand there staring glassy-eyed as she gave me some kind of instructions having to do with the girls, the dog, dinner—who in hell remembers? And I guess I must have nodded and said “Okay” in a Homer Simpson voice, then continued on in that liquid, wall-eyed trance till she shook me out of it again with another list.

Come to think of it, I haven’t been sleeping well either. And the little REM sleep I did get was spent on dreams about men with fake hair and big teeth, and women who laugh too loudly. Actually, that last part can probably be attributed to the fact that I recently watched ‘Strictly Ballroom.’

Self-Publishing is Hard

The main reason writers self-publish is to take control of their destiny. Well, guess what. It’s a lot of work! You are now the person in charge of writing, editing, publishing and marketing the book. You have only yourself to blame if things don’t happen—or happen in the wrong sequence. It’s all you, baby. Welcome to Hell.

Not that I’m complaining. I chose to do this. It’s just that there are only so many hours in a day, etc. And although I’ve published short stories for more than a year, this is my first novel. It’s a huge undertaking.

By the way, in case you’re interested, the book I’m publishing is called Tell Me When I’m Dead. It’s a contemporary zombie novel set in Northern California. More on that later.

It All Creeps Up on You

Writing is, in many ways, the easy part. I find a quiet spot and bang out the words. When I was writing the first draft of my novel, things went fairly smoothly. When I wasn’t actually writing, I was thinking about the book and where it would lead me. Pure paradise compared to what I’m doing today.

Now it’s heads-down work. Create a marketing plan, purchase book templates, find someone who can format the eBook, ISBNs, bar codes, blurbs—it’s endless! In the latest draft of my book I quote song lyrics, and the other day I learned that I could be opening myself up to a big fat lawsuit—so out those go!

Again, I’m not complaining, but I am tired. I should have paced myself.

Lesson Learned

I have to say that it was my wife who insisted I take off the weekend and just veg. And that’s exactly what I did. I caught up some movies—including ‘Argo,’ which was fantastic by the way. Though I’m still somewhat stressed, I do feel better.

I’m sharing this cautionary tale with you because I know there are a lot of writers out there going through the same thing. You should never let yourself get to the point where you mentally flatline. The key is to breathe deep. I continue to remind myself—and my wife does too—that my deadline to publish is self-imposed. Because of all the things that need to happen now, though, there is no real advantage to putting it off. Because all those things would just have to get done later.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to find a paper bag to breathe into and watch ‘Charlie the Unicorn.’

Related articles

Am I Good Enough? (stevenramirez.com)
More Stress-Inducing Wise Words from the King (dreamama.wordpress.com)
When It’s Done (bentrubewriter.wordpress.com)


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