Still butthurt over Twilight?

This is not my Breaking Dawn review. What brought this on was your standard photo meme on Facebook, another crack at sparkles. At least two of these are posted per day, usually by dudes, and always with the same spitting disdain that they have for anything seen in a feminine light. Normally, I just sigh and click “Hide” so I don’t have to see these stupid daily jabs at a fandom that doesn’t deserve all this hate. But yesterday, I got tired of biting my tongue.

I made a series of comments under the same photo, and have decided to paste them here, correct my typos, and expand on some sections. If you think sparkles are the worst thing ever, feel free to walk away now. But I’m about to explain why what you’re doing is pure sexism, and you might risk learning something if you read this. So if you are proud of being ignorant, walk on, dickhead. The rest of you buckled in? Okay, here we go:

Still butthurt much, men? You know, I’m starting to get that the real reason you protest sparkling so much is because you see it as emasculation of one of your most typical male power fantasy tropes. Every other complaint lobbed at Edward and his kind really boils down to, “They made us look weak!” Which is kind of stupid because aside from the “vegetarians,” all the other vampires in the books are pretty evil and still capable of munching humans with reckless abandon.

And while I’m on about this, I’m going to talk about Angel, Buffy, and Whedon’s take on vampires. See, Whedon ALSO set up his characters to drink animal blood in place of killing people. Angel and Spike both stalk Buffy and treat her as a possession to be won, and Angel’s brooding in his own show is actually much, much more noticeable than Edward’s self-loathing over what he is. Angel has the additional moping point that sleeping with Buffy will result in “perfect happiness,” instantly transforming him into pure evil Angelus. So he can “never be too happy.” Meanwhile, Edward has lots of moments of smiling and happiness. He has a great girlfriend, he’s a musician, and a great baseball player. Angel is just a pissy “champion” whining about how unfair life is because he wants Buffy and can’t have her. Even when he finds a girl he likes, he only sleeps with her because she’s a substitute for Buffy. Sorry dudes, but Angel is way more whining and self-loathing than Edward, and he even gives Louis from the Anne Rice vampire books a run for his whining money. So, why do Edward’s few moments of unhappiness get him complained at so much more than Angel? Sparkles.

Now, what’s interesting about this is how the same ideas as expressed by a male writer are applauded as badass, while Edward is despised for having the same traits, because one aspect of his physical appearance is seen as demeaning by male readers. This contempt bleeds over to the female fans who also pick up the chant, “Buffy would have staked Edward.” However, given Buffy’s past with Spike and Angel, and her ability to listen and judge vampires as individuals, it’s actually more likely that she would so totally bone Edward before dumping him and moving onto some other guy. Possibly after dying and being resurrected again.

But getting back to my problem with this Buffy/Angel VS Twilight thing is, fans are a-okay with a vampire doing all the things Edward does. They just can’t stand the idea of any aspect of a character emasculating their beloved monsters. To this end, Edward and his pacifist family are focused on exclusively, while James, Laurent, the Volturri, and all evil vampires are ignored. The series “sucks,” because Edward makes men feel lessened by his sparkling.

Meanwhile, Whedon gets a free pass for some truly lousy writing for WHOLE SEASONS, and these same behaviors that Edward, Angel, and Spike share are accepted because a man wrote it, and that’s different. Meyer is seen in the same vein as Rice for “ruining vampires,” even though she uses the same ideas as male writers. So, regardless of what other reasons people paw at, the whole thing boils down to sexism. If a man writes it, it’s badass. But if a woman writes it, it’s ruining the trope.

The thing that annoys me most of all is that the series isn’t even about the vampires, but about Bella and how a child of divorced neglectful parents comes into her own abilities as a woman. People always say “Bella does whatever Edward wants,” but this isn’t true in any instance given. Edward DOES tell Bella what he thinks she should do, and then Bella does what she wants anyway. She does this in book one to chase James, thinking she is saving her mother. She does it again in New Moon, chasing down Edward to save him from his own suicidal tendencies.

(By the way, Edward, who gets shit for “hurting Bella” by leaving in New Moon, is actually trying to protect her from himself, and the ONLY time he injures her is while pushing her out of the way of Jasper, who’s gone into a bloodlust. Even that torments him, and his moping is justified. Yet this is the point used most often to suggest that Edward is an abuser. It’s an act examined in a vacuum, but meanwhile, Spike can attempt to rape Buffy and still leave the show with ladies gushing about how romantic he is. Angel can beat Buffy for a full season, and his abusive nature is never questioned. Why does Edward catch shit as an abuser? SPARKLES. Feh.)

Bella does it again in Eclipse, when despite the very real danger Jacob represents as a new werewolf, Bella still chooses to see him and remain his friend. Edward’s concern for Bella is justified, and one only needs to look at Sam’s girlfriend to see that, or to look at scenes where Jacob is at risk of transforming and harming Bella. But again, events are examined in a vacuum, and so Edward ripping out the engine of Bella’s truck is seen as abuse, when all he’s doing is trying to protect someone he loves. Edward doesn’t hit Bella for talking back, always concedes defeat on every argument and issue they have, and tries to talk Bella out of becoming a vampire. But he’s still a big ol’ meanie. Why? Sparkles.

Bella’s story is one of a strong woman using passive methods to achieve her goals, and since passive women are not accepted by the mainstream, she is pushed to the background while people complain about Edward. The main character of her own books, Bella can’t catch a break with men despite the fact that she’s funny, smart, and has great loyalty to her family and friends. All these should be positive traits, but again, Edward sparkles, so Bella must be torn down as well.

In the final book, Bella chooses to protect her unborn child, even if it will mean her own death. This is consistent with her willingness to sacrifice herself for the ones she loves. And Buffy/Angel fans, look at the bullshit about Angel and Darla having a baby when “nothing like this has ever happened before.” THAT’S ALMOST THE EXACT SAME PLOT. But when your dude Whedon does it, it’s genius. When Meyer does it, it’s ruining the trope.

Being a victim of neglect, Bella never sees herself as worthy of love, and this rings true to me. I can speak with authority, being the child of divorced parents and a victim of neglect. So the writing in the story feels accurate, and all the same ideas in Twilight show up in other fiction. Bella isn’t Ellen Ripley, but Ellen is herself a trope of men, the badass woman who acts just like a man. Bella’s passive behavior is more consistent with how real women act when confronted with obstacles, but Bella doesn’t get credit. Why? Sparkles.

It always comes back to one element that really doesn’t change the story one way or the other. There’s lots to enjoy in the story, if only people would let go of this butthurt over the vampires being “emasculated.” No one is, and people complaining over Twilight ten years after, even with some small press publisher pushing Vampires Don’t Sparkle as an anthology title, are still unwilling to admit that their issue with Twilight is a sexist attitude. But it is, and I find it rather sad that people can obsess negatively over four fiction books more than they do over real world problems. All because “sparkles are gay, and I ain’t no homo lover.” Oh, do get over yourselves, you simpering geeks. You play at being alpha males, but the vast majority of you are just sexists looking for a place to grind your small penis issue axes on.

So yep, that’s the expanded ramble. Making more friends every day. (>_>)