Chapter 7 – Call for Obstruction

So far, Barry collided with a courier van, and the accident turned into a job opportunity to drive for their service. After signing an employment contract he has second thoughts about working for his new boss, Margery. Only she has a bizarre control over his body and a mean disposition to hurt him to get him to do what she wants. He will have to work for her or suffer the consequences.

I’ve only been on the road for a couple of hours when I pass the last exit into Pueblo. Still, it feels like I’ve been driving half the day. My stomach growls but it’s too late to stop for fast food. I should have grabbed a mini-box of fruity cereal when I left my apartment, but thanks to Margery’s intestinal interference I’ll go hungry until Trinidad.

A hacking cough echoes throughout the van.

Great, Margery, I think.

“Yeah, honey, Margery.”

My heart skips to think she can now read my mind.

“Wanted to let you know a few of the drivers have encountered a flock of white birds just south of Pueblo.”

“Those things really exist?” I squirm in my seat and wonder how close they could be to my current location.

“You listened to the CD, didn’t you?”

“Well, yeah, but giant white birds that attack vans? I’m not a zoologist, but I’ve never heard of anything like that. I mean, who could take it seriously.”

“If you’re finished, Mister Smarty-pants, you’re in one of the new vans. The damage should be minimal.”

“Shouldn’t I get off the highway. Wait for them to clear.”

“You’ll do no such thing. Besides, there’s no way to avoid them.”

“But it’s my first day.” My voice rises in pitch. “I don’t know if I can do this.”

“Honey, the first day’s always the hardest,” she says almost sympathetic, then turns like a scorpion. “Don’t make me remind you about your contract again.”

I want to tell her what she can do with her contract, until I spy a white mass in the sky, closing in too quickly to be a cloud.

“They see you, honey. Hold your position.”

“How do you know these things?”

Margery ignores my question. “They won’t hurt you unless you stop. So don’t stop!”

A flock of the largest birds I’ve ever seen dive straight at me. There must be at least fifty of them. The first bird strikes the passenger side door like a cannon ball. One by one they assault the van, rocking it side to side. All the while, white wings hovered and slap against the windshield, partially obstructing my view of the road.

I hold tightly onto the steering wheel and floor the gas pedal. “This isn’t happening!”

“It sure is, honey.”

“Stop calling me honey!”

Margery hacks so hard she sounds like she might pass out.

“It’s not funny! I’m in the middle of The Birds on steroids!”

“Honey, did you forget your training?”

With screeching birds crashing against the van, I only hear half of what she says. I frown and have to ask, ”What?”

“Hit the damn emergency button!”

“But you’re already on the speaker!”

“Continue to tell me how to do my job and you’ll end up bird seed?”

I lean in to tap the button and come eye to eye with a human face as ghostly pale as the flapping wings. The creature punches a crack across the windshield and my head whips backward. When the glass melds back together, it snarls as it tries to break through again. But with each hit, the glass keeps fixing itself.

“They’re not birds,” I whisper at first. Then, for Margery’s benefit, scream, “They’re not birds!”

“Really?” She jeers.

Outside the driver’s side window, another creature has a tight grip on the side view mirror. It hisses and bares a set of sharp teeth while it yanks at the door handle. When it tries to scratch through glass with sharp claws, my body jerks to the right and I turn the steering wheel with it. I slam on the brake, hoping to force it off the van, and the vehicle goes into a tail spin before it skids to a stop. The hits to the van louden as I remember Margery’s warning to keep moving. I floor the gas pedal even though my view is blocked and I have no idea where I might end up.

“Hold it steady,” Margery says. “Help’s arrived.”

“Thank God.”

“Honey, God’s got nothing to do with this rescue mission.”

The sound of birds cawing surrounds the van and rises to an ear-splitting volume. A few of the white creatures take to the air and are replaced by thrushes pecking their way passed the white things to protect the van. While a war between black and white commences around me, my only intent is to keep the van as straight as I can and not end up in a ditch.

All at once, the white creatures retreat back into the sky, chased by the black birds. I still can’t see where I’m going though. They left behind a smear of red on the windshield and blood continues to rain down on the van until I’m pretty sure they’re all gone. I fiddle with the controls on the dashboard until the wipers come on and a jet of blue liquid squirts onto the bloody mix. The sight of it makes me queasy. I gag and swallow hard.

When the windshield’s clean enough to see through and I know I’m safe, for some reason, I feel in more of a panic. My chest tightens and I’m shaking like I’ve just jumped into a pool of ice water. Am I having a heart attack?

I hit the emergency button, but Margery doesn’t answer. I hit it a second time and still nothing. Bam! Bam! Bam! I slam my fist down on it repeatedly.

“Honey, what?”

“I . . . can’t . . . breathe.” I pant like a dog in between each word. “I’m having . . . a heart attack.”

“Don’t be silly. You’re in shock.” Margery let out one of her scratchy laughs.

“Shock?”

“When’s the last time you were attacked by a flock of giant white birds?”

“I don’t know what kind of operation you’re running, but those were not birds.” I clutch at his chest with one hand while white knuckling the steering wheel with the other. “I need CPR.”

“Stop being so dramatic,” Margery says. “I don’t have time for this nonsense.”

“I can’t—”

Margery cuts me off with a click as she disconnects from the emergency system.

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