5 effective ways to deal with Criticism and put-downs

And so we all come across them--the drains (people who leave you feeling drained) , the prickers incorporated , the damp squibs who can never be happy for you and the ones possessed by the green-eyed monster who scrutinize you from head to toe and actually find something to say to put you down. (Oh yes--there are many like that!)



How do you deal with such people? What can you do to not let their attitude or what they say affect you?





While you do not have much control over what others will say and do, you definitely can control how you respond.



Here  are five things that you can do:



First : Identify where the criticism is coming from. Why is this person putting you down ? Is there substance in what this person is saying? Is it jealousy? Most of us tend to be harsh on ourselves. Don't be! Give yourself some credit!



Second : Recognise that put-downs can be a good thing too. We all feel happy when there is only praise. However, criticism can also make us pause and think. It can make us re-evaluate whether what we are doing is in alignment with where we want to be. Is there a better way of doing what we have done?



Third : Look at the credentials of the 'critic'. Is it a person you hold in high esteem? If so what do you appreciate about that person? Is that person 'qualified' to give you criticism? Has that person achieved a certain amount of success in the field where the criticism is being offered?



Fourth : Remember--it is just an opinion. Like the famous quote goes (it appeared first in the movie 'dead pool')  "Opinions are like a*%#-holes. Everyone has one". At the end of the day, it is their opinion. It is not set in stone or sacrosanct.



Fifth : Mentally list all the stuff you *are* great at! Think of all the things you did right. All the splendid stuff in your life that you are happy about. SMILE. And do not react at all to criticism. Nothing gets a person more rattled than knowing their words did not affect you at all  (if it is 'false' criticism. You are smart enough to figure out when it is fuelled by jealousy and when it is fulled by having your best interests at heart.) :)

 

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Chennai on 19th February at 6.30 pm. Come and say a hi if you are around
:)






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