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Ladies and gentlemen,Today, February the 14th,...
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Ladies and gentlemen,
Today, February the 14th, is a very special day. I don’t think anyone out there needs me to remind them why today is celebrated in the hearts and minds of people all across America.
Today we all raise our glasses and celebrate the 84th anniversary of the St. Valentines Day Massacre, which took place on this very day in 1929. The Massacre was an incident of violence that in many ways exemplifies the dreamy nostalgia many of us feel for the heady and morally upright days of American Prohibition (let no one tell you otherwise: when those temperance reformers fought to make alcohol illegal, this is exactly the sort of upstanding citizen activity they had in mind).
Ladies and gentleman, on this day, February the 14th, I want each and every one of you to turn to the one you love and say “Darling, I’m so very glad you haven’t been murdered in a booze-related gang war.” (It’s important for all of us to keep these things in perspective)
Happy St. Valentine’s Day Massacre Day, one and all!
Thank you, and good night.
P.S. “Buy Moxie!”
