This Despicable Wreck of a Society

Everywhere I go in this hometown of mine I see laws being broken left and right. Worse, they are being committed by people in power and those aspiring to be in power. This is most evident come election time, like right now. I have previously posted a link to the COMELEC rules and guidelines on proper campaign conduct, and I’ve yet to see a single local candidate stick to it. All of them have broken the rules. And they do it with impunity. And COMELEC it seems, is helpless to do anything. I have reported such illegal activities twice, and have gotten no response.

Everytime I go into town my blood never fails to boil whenever I see these politicians smile their fake smiles parading their photoshopped teeth and lipsticked lips at me through posters placed where they are not allowed to be, long before the allowed campaign period begins.

I also see proposed buildings about to be constructed without the benefit of Architects, and of course, those buildings in their proposed perspectives, look butt fucking ugly. That’s what you get for not getting Architects. Strictly speaking, that is illegal now as well. RA 9266 specifically states that every building that is to be constructed needs to be designed and signed by an Architect. This is a law that has been passed for many years now. And yet, buildings are still being built without Architects.

I was part of a team of Architects who met with a group of civil engineers at the local building office a few years ago and that meeting ended on a sour note. I get the impression that the local government just refuses to enforce this law.

And this is just the tip of the iceberg, so to speak.

Today I learn a senator who once tried to pass bills that would control what we read and what we saw, who tried to pass bills that would try to muzzle our freedom online, is now championing another bill that seeks to uphold ignorance.

If ever it becomes law, should I care? I do, but for all we know, this would be another law that would just be completely ignored like all the rest. What makes this law special that it HAS to be enforced while the others that I have listed above never have been?

Fine me, put me in jail for importing a BOOK? FUCK YOU, SENATOR. You aren’t getting my vote. You have NEVER gotten my vote. If I ever decide to vote that is.

I’ve become hesitant to step out of the house because I know I’ll just get mad. Mad at everything and anything, about things that I have absolutely no control over.

I get mad perhaps because I care a little too much about what’s right. At 45, I’m not too sure if it’s a healthy thing to stay idealistic. Because I find I’m mad a lot of the time. And it just eats me up inside.

More and more I’m thinking that to achieve peace of mind means becoming apathetic as well. Because of I stop caring, I will no longer be mad. This country can go fuck itself all it wants and what’s it to me? I don’t care. Would I want to be THAT person? Would I want to be that person who throws up his hands and say “We’ll that’s how it is in this country. Get over it.” Do I WANT to be that guy? For a long time I hated people like that because to be apathetic is to be part of the problem and not the solution. To be apathetic is to surrender, and that leads to atrophy and decay. Morally, spiritually, and intellectually.

Surprisingly enough, despicable wreck of a society that this is, it still works. Our country is generally peaceful, compared to other countries. We aren’t a nation at war. We aren’t a nation under communist or fascist dictatorship where simply writing something like this online can get me jailed or killed.

I am alive. I have a job. I have the freedom to choose which religion I want, and I have the freedom to choose not to have one if I so wanted. I have the freedom to wear what I want, cut my hair any way I want. I can go out and afford to eat and not have to fight with people for it. I have the freedom to vote, if I so choose. I have the freedom to leave the country and visit other places. I am free to improve my standing in life, buy my own property and call it mine. I have the freedom to create a business. I can even afford to be ambitious and dream of achieving big things.

Other people may contend that I should just shut up and be thankful for what I have. Others have it worse.

Is it so wrong, even when I have so much already, to want things to be better? Is it so wrong to ask that the law be followed when it is only the right thing to do? Yes, we have all those things, but we should not just settle for it. We should always strive to do better, always to do things better. If we got it good, then let’s not stop and let’s wish for things to be even better. No good will come from just settling. We do it not just for ourselves, but for those will follow after us.

So am I going to surrender, be apathetic? Be like those other guys who just take it, hold up their hands and say, “That’s how it is!”

I don’t know. It’s a dilemma I find myself in. I know I’ll never stop caring, but I have to do something that will keep me from dying of frustration and anger every time I go out. I want to achieve peace of mind without having to let go of things I believe in. The world will still go on, it will continue to spin, and society will continue to move on even when I die. In fact, society will even hardly notice I’m not there, so am I just getting worked up for nothing? Endangering my life by getting frustrated by things that don’t even know I exist?

My wife always tells me I’m a worrier. I find that this is true. I worry about the littlest of things. I need to find a way to get that in control. I have to learn to let go. It’s a time of great confusion for me. I’m thinking I may have to go away for a while, and think. Somewhere I can just cut myself off from everything. And it’s got to be soon.