Blast from the Past: It Makes Me Shutter*
Originally appeared at the Lipstick Chronicles blog as a guest post
I love the Internet. I mean, really. As in I love it ALOT. I can chat with people in New Zealand just as easily as I do with folks in the next office. I can read articles aboutThor’s Hammer or peruse newly released World War II era color photographs. I can indulge my easily distracted brain with pretty much anything I want. I can share pictures of my cat, my trip, my book signings, my silliness. Google is my friend and my blog buddies can be my closest confidants. There is no answer that I can’t uncover** and Wikipedia is of teh awesome liek woah. 
The Internet has brought me amazing friendships, love, laughter, joy. Though in the last few years, it’s brought me the absolute and utter amusement of the mangling of the English language—by native speakers. At first, I was beyond incensed, ready to wield the flaming sword of the righteous (is there a patron saint or angel of grammar?).
I’m a writer, damn it, and a total grammar nerd. I mean, I subscribe to the online version of the Chicago Manual of Style, for fun! The topmost item on my ongoing wish list is a subscription to the OED online. With all these amazing resources, how can people be so ignorant of the rules of grammar, punctuation and spelling? Honestly! When the proper usage can be found with a simple search? When in-depth discussions of the Oxford comma take up megapixels of my screen? It’s ridiculous!
One day, the answer to my rage occurred to me. Ridiculous became the default keyword in these situations. Instead of getting angry, I could chose to be the other “a” word: amused.
I’ve gone from wanting to tear my hair out at its gray roots to chuckling over the umpteenth example of homonym abuse and misuse. I don’t worry about folks’ education or lack thereof. Now, I just wonder at the (sometimes) insanity I see and rest easy in mind that I can take the high road. For every correct phrase, there’s another just as heartfelt, but absurdedly worded or spelled. It’s become a fun pastime and frankly, I can read posts and comments without my brain exploding. So much nicer that way. So much less stress.
I no longer cringe when I see tips on how to loose weight or that ice cream is the best desert. Characters peaking around the door don’t raise my peek, nor do they rein on my parade, but I sometimes still have to reign in my comments. Via a tech loop I belong to, I’m often asked to go sightsee a Web site, but I always make sure my responses and feedback are thoughtful rather then mean. I know that this isn’t a conspiracy against my friends and I, but a reel, true and well-meaning group of concerned citizens who just want to be herd.
Yes, I still sigh in vein, but I know that I can’t fix this. Some days, I do have to put the breaks on my initial urge to correct, to teach, to educate. I know it would just be a time waist. So I hold back my instinct in a vice-like grip and chuckle. After all, this is the Intarwebs. I try to not let it effect my blood pressure. I’ll bear this burden. I’ll except this homonym abuse. Instead, I’ll continue to rack my brain for better ways of using words in my own books to avoid typo’s. I suggest you all do the same, in loo of loosing your cool.
I’d love for you all to share you’re own pain…***
‘S’alright? ‘S’all right.
* Seen on a blog post reply
** Even if it’s wrong
*** I reserve the right to lose it over egregious apostrophe abuse
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