On Forgiving | MaryAnn Diorio

Over the years, forgiveness has been a subject close to my heart, perhaps because I’ve needed to forgive so many people in my life, but, most of all, because I’ve needed so much forgiveness myself.

Most of us at one time or another struggle with forgiving those who have hurt us. I think that one of the reasons we struggle is that we don’t understand what forgiveness really is. This misunderstanding keeps us in bondage and living with a constant undertone of anger and bitterness, thereby hurting both our souls and our bodies.

To explain what forgiveness is, let’s look first at what it is NOT:

• Forgiveness is NOT letting someone off the hook.

• Forgiveness is NOT condoning evil.

• Forgiven is NOT being a doormat.

• Forgiveness is NOT having to trust again the person who hurt you.

• Forgiveness is NOT a feeling.

• Forgiveness is NOT an option.

Now let’s look at what forgiveness IS:

• Forgiveness IS taking the person who hurt you off of your hook and placing him on God’s hook, then asking for God’s mercy on that person.

• Forgiveness IS acknowledging that evil was done but choosing to bear the consequences of that evil without retaliation.

• Forgiveness IS taking charge of your emotions.

• Forgiveness IS setting boundaries with the person who hurt you, even refusing interaction with that person for a time or forever, if necessary, such as in cases of physical abuse.

• Forgiveness IS a decision.

• Forgiveness IS obedience to God’s commandment to forgive.

Forgiveness is at the center of the Gospel message. God forgave us through Jesus Christ. We, too, forgive others through the power of Jesus Christ. Only by His power can we truly forgive. And only by His power can we be truly forgiven. As we choose to forgive, we discover that unforgiveness enslaves while forgiveness sets free.

To help you in your struggle with forgiveness, I’ve written a novella entitled A CHRISTMAS HOMECOMING.  For more information, please contact me at maryann@maryanndiorio.com/bookstore or visit the Harbourlight Books website.

Dr. MaryAnn Diorio loves God, people, children, and dogs, in that order. She also is passionate about story and its power to transform the human heart. Dr. MaryAnn, as she is affectionately called, writes compelling fiction that deals with the deepest issues of life. She is Adjunct Online Professor of Fiction Writing for Regent University and coaches writers on their journey to publication. MaryAnn and her husband Dominic are the blessed parents of two wonderful daughters and a fantastic son-in-law.

Find out more about MaryAnn at http://maryanndiorio.com/.