The First Annual Teddies! Presenting my Arbitrary Awards for Achievement in Film.

Hi, Cinephiles!

Michael Caine, seen here holding a lesser prize.

I love seeing as many movies as I can every year in theaters. I love writing preposterously long blog posts. And, against my better judgement, I love awards shows.

So with the Golden Globes gone by and the Oscars yet to come, it is only natural that I, a person who is just as ill-informed and fickle-minded as any of the voters for those awards, have decided to create an awards show of my own.

And so…I now present to you the Teddy Aw...