Let the Army Draft the Hipsters

The following blog is my first attempt to write about hipsters. I certainly don't feel "done" by any means; I just wanted to start writing about them and here is my first piece. Now, it's time to get spicy with it.

                          Note: the following post is best read with Deadmau5 playing

That’s right. Draft the hipsters for war. Demand George W. Bush return and recreationally invade another Islamic country if need be. Because nothing is more limp than this generation of American hipsters—they look down upon the mainstream ignorance, but can’t actually stand for something important.

I believe in a riot with a purpose. A Molotov cocktail with a direction.

Wear skinny gay blue jeans, but let it be a challenge to the puritan morality of Rick Santorum who thinks homosexuals are a disease.

Smoke cigarettes as a radical slant on personal liberty, but blow the smoke back at the absurdist policies of New York City where it cost $15 bucks a pack.

Snort the cocaine in that same urban metropolis, but talk my fuckin’ ear off about how President Uribe of Columbia ruthlessly killed his own people (with American guns) without addressing the real issue: that the market is you—the cocaine consumer in skinny jeans who puffs smoke and just wants more.

In our post-Vietnam era, today’s counter-culture kids are indeed called hipsters. They tend to be urban-living, and all about their individual style that seeks to break from the shackles of conformist America. They think they hold the moral high ground because they are different. But they are not. They have nothing to say.

As you can tell, I’ve been struggling with this bummer for sometime: I belong to a generation with no focus or meaning or anything at all. We’re just plain lost. Everyone’s gone insular, finding the essence of life with second hand goods, only to be worn to some Saturday near-the-park event with no narrative or purpose.

I’m longing for substance with my people. Something like the Bohemian beat in the 50’s, the anti-war hippies of the 60’s, or wherever the hell the Jefferson Starship took you in the 70’s.

Someone smart should stand up. Someone young. Someone to talk about America’s addiction to war and defense spending. Glass-Steagall. And how the trickle down theory really just means that the Republicans are pissing on you.

Healthcare with small business? Yep. Fitzgerald was right: the whole way of American life is rigged. 

And of more outrage is that the hipsters are silent. They are smart and they have the education. They have the coolness and means. But what do they stand for?

Please tell me that something is spinning better than Deadmau5 with frisbee golf.

Take your ticket, man.  I'm drafting the hipsters.     

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