A Triscuit, a Tasket, Your Question Do Not Ask It

I found a number on the side of my Triscuit box.  It's for people who have questions about Triscuits.

So I called it.

A woman answered.

"Thank you for calling Kraft Foods.  Can I help you?"

"Hi," I said, "Is this the number for people who have Triscuit-related questions?"

"Yes, it is," she said.

"Great," I said, "I have a buddy who eats a box of Triscuits a day.  As a Triscuit-eater, what can he do to bring about peace in the Middle East?"

There was a long pause.

"I don't have an answer for that,"...