What's Your Name?

There are societies where a person chooses his/her own name at the age of maturity, and I vote for that. Parents just aren't the best people to be slapping a moniker on a person, and how do they know how you're going to turn out? Luckily I wasn't a large or one-legged child, but I still got "Piggy" and "Peg-leg" thrown at me by kids (and some weird adults) who thought it was funny. We've never figured out what my mother was thinking when she spelled my sister's name totally differently from the traditional way, but my sister has spent her life dealing with it. And don't get my husband started on being called "Johnny" until he was almost forty.



Every name has its possible pitfalls, so why not let a person choose his own poison? That would prevent being stuck with "Moon" or "Placenta" or "Corinthian" for life. At graduation ceremonies each student could, after serious and ponderous thought, proclaim his new appelation. Of course, a few would proclaim themselves "Bacardi Jones" or "Hottie Smith", but at least they'd have to accept that they did it to themselves. And whatever you chose, you'd have to recognize that your family would still call you what they call you, "Jughead" or "Junior"...or "Johnny".