my stormy lessons

There's No Place Like Home For The Holidays



Well, once again we're at the time of year when our friends and family are in the foreground of our thoughts. All the holidays throughout the year are great, but you have to admit, there's something a little extra special about Thanksgiving, Christmas, and ringing in the New Year.



Oh, the excitement of the Christmas Programs and church services we attend to celebrate the birth of our Savior. The wonderful smells of all the festive foods that comes from kitchens everywhere. The gatherings of special people that fill the homes. The baking of the special treats you only get once a year. The shopping for that perfect gift. The laughter and songs that spread like wildfire. The trips that are being planned. The decorations being perfectly placed inside and outside of houses. The family traditions that are being carried on from generations past. The little bounce in the steps of people passing each other on the streets. There's just a “certain feeling” at this time of year. I think everyone would agree, "there's no place like home for the holidays." But that little phrase has a whole different meaning to me now.



Indeed, this is a precious time of year. It's precious, unless you're grieving the loss of a loved one. Then this time of year can be daunting, and cause you to go into emotional overdrive. Depending on where you are on your "Grief Journey," determines how much you will allow yourself to experience the joy of this season.


Maybe you're still desperately clinging to your newly birthed "Grief Journey" because it's the most recent thing you have that connects you with your loved one that's gone. In that case the holidays are something you might just wish would just disappear. It almost pains you to think about them, and that is normal.


Maybe you're a little further down the road of your “Grief Journey” and it's not as bad as it used to be, but you just can't get very excited about anything. Since your holidays aren't going to be the way they used to be, you tend to go through the motions for the sake of those around you, but really, you just want to get them over with because they aren't as much fun now, and that is normal.


Or maybe you've rounded enough bends in your “Grief Journey” that you can begin to see the flickering of the flame of joy in your heart again, and you're ready to embrace the “New Normal” of your life and the holidays. If you're not at this place yet, you will be one day. Just continue to wake up every day and speak Philippians 4:13: “For I can do everything through Christ who gives me strength.”

In the beginning of our “Grief Journey” the only one we're really focused on is US . Grief is all about US . Grief is a very selfish creature that comes to live in us when someone we love goes “Home.” Grief is not about our loved ones that are temporarily separated from us, it's about US that are left here missing them. Our loved ones don't have a clue what we're going through because grief is not for them. The aren't “looking down” on us watching our hearts break and seeing the river of tears we cry because we miss them so much. They aren't “seeing” us struggle through the days that are just too difficult for us to “be happy and live the way they would want us to live.” If they could “look down” on us, or “see” what we were doing, it would break their heart and hurt them to see our grief. It would make them share our tears and cry right along with us. They would be sad for us. So, there's no way they could know about our grief because there are no tears, sadness, sorrow, heartbreak, or grief in Heaven. There is only Rejoicing, Praising, Singing, Worshiping, etc. That's why grief is the epitome of selfishness. It's all about the individual that's grieving not the person they are grieving for.



I'm telling you, if we could just step out of our grief during this Christmas season, even if only for a few minutes, and walk a few steps of where our loved ones are walking right now, we would truly see there's no comparison in where we are and where they are. One day we'll be "Home" with them and we won't remember our "Grief Journey" at all. Our home on earth is a mere speck to the "Home" our Father has created for us in Heaven. Once we're there, for the first time EVER , we will truly understand the phrase, “there's no place like “HOME” for the holidays.”



Merry Christmas.



Until the next time we talk......Stand firm on Philippians 4:13.

Love, Hugs, & Prayers,

~tf