“A cow in heat with such a limp would admittedly keep silent about drugs in sheep on a farm.”

.

Well, I should think so!

Where were we?

Oh yeah: A pangram is a sentence that uses all the letters of the alphabet at least one time. A commonly heard example: “The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog.”

That’s an example in English, of course – but what about other languages? Do they have pangrams, too? Of course! But since we don’t know other languages (Uncle John is fluent in Pig-Latin and Donutian, he would like you to know), we give you “Foreign Pangrams Helpfully Translated Into English For Your Reading Pleasure!” Enjoy!

Italian: “But the fox with her leap has reached the quiet Fido.”
Portuguese: “A curious little tortoise saw ten happy storks.”
Danish: “The quiz contestants ate strawberry with cream while Walter the circus clown played the xylophone.”
Latvian: “Glass shack gnomes steal Bach piano covers while inebriated.”
Croatian: “The overweight little schoolboy with a bike is holding hops and fine cotton in the pocket of his attire.”
French: “Mister Jack, you type much better than your friend Wolf.”
Swedish: “God help Zorn’s maiden get trousers quickly.”
Hebrew: “A curious fish sailed the sea disappointedly, and suddenly found company.”
Turkish: “The patient in pajamas quickly trusted the swarthy driver.”
Slovak: “A flock of woodpeckers teach a horse to feed on bark.”
Icelandic: “A cow in heat with such a limp would admittedly keep silent about drugs in sheep on a farm.”
Russian: “So eat more of these soft French loaves, and have some tea!”
Polish:“Come on, drop your sadness into the depth of a bottle!”
Korean: “The essential condition for a kiss is that lips meet and there is no special technique required.”
Romanian: “Drinking whisky, the drunken jazzman threw up right in the tequila.”
Bulgarian: “For a moment I was in someone else’s plush squeaking armchair.”
Klingon: “Because of your apparent audacity the depressed conqueror is willing to fight you.”

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Special Uncle John Editor’s Note: You can find that very list on page 377 – and almost 600 other pages of wit, wisdom, weirdness, and wildebeests (sorry, that’s not true, there are no wildebeests in this book) – in our very latest, Uncle John’s FULLY LOADED 25TH ANNIVERSARY Bathroom Reader. (And it’s 30% OFF UNTIL JANUARY 1! And don’t forget the EBook version.)