So what I mean is that I write about things that probably...

So what I mean is that I write about things that probably no one in his right mind would want to write about, like the awful relationship I had in college in Reno, where I was with this woman and the two of us together were drinking a lot, and I was also doing a lot of drugs, and I'm pretty sure there was some chemical imbalance going on, too, because, while things have changed significantly for me, they haven't for her (I mean, I saw her mugshot on the internet recently), and the whole time my parents and brother and sister were worried about when they would get a middle-of-the-night call from the Reno Police Department about where they'd found my body. One time, when I attempted suicide, I ended up sneaking out of the hospital because my girlfriend told me they were going to take me to the state mental health hospital and keep me under observation. Anyway, most people, I don't think, would want to go back to relive those moments in their lives--not that most people have such moments, but I'd be surprised if there weren't large numbers of people who have similar experiences. The thing I'm saying is that I'm not unique. But the way to talk about all this is to be honest about it, and part of that honesty is explaining that it was mostly my fault. I mean, I know that my girlfriend at the time wasn't a good influence, but was that her fault necessarily? I should've gotten the hell out at the first sign of trouble (like, before we even started "officially" dating, because, you see, she was dating a friend of mine and, well, it's complicated, but that right there is the trouble), but I didn't get the hell out because I was too insecure to go after another woman because I knew that this one liked me. And my insecurities are what led me to using drugs and drinking way too much and those insecurities are what led me into many an emergency room. Fortunately, I had these strengths in other places. I was really into school, and I worked hard at it, and did well, and I graduated and started graduate school (at my undergrad alma mater) and that was one way I kept focus. That and I already knew at that time that I wanted to be a writer, so I was always focused on that. So I let myself fall apart in some areas and built myself up in others. Ultimately, the only thing that really saved my ass was getting the hell out of Reno. But what I'm trying to say is that in order to be honest about all that, I have to admit to these shortcomings: that I was insecure because I was overweight, and I drank alcohol and did drugs because I was able to have friends by doing these things, and having friends made me feel better about the fact that I didn't have a significant other because I was overweight (and, nevermind the fact that I was like 21 years old and didn't know what the fuck life had in store for me!), and when I ended up with a significant other I continued on the same path and that led to the other problems that I really only ever overcame by leaving that town and moving on with my life. That's the kind of stuff I think that's worth writing about, I guess.