How to Be Fearless: A (Sort of) Ceremony in 4 Easy Steps

Me as Artemis, Goddess of Wildness 1998 My first experience invoking the Goddess, Halloween 1998 with the incorrigible Deva Munay.  I had graduated from college the June before and was married in July.  Twenty-two years old, I didn't know--and could not yet imagine--what my life should be.  I was scared of my potential, and afraid of not having any potential at all.

So I dressed as a Goddess.  Artemis is fiercely independent, a maiden, a guardian of the wildness that lives within us all.  That night I chose boldness, spoke, thought and acted with a greater presence than I had yet begun to muster.  I made decisions based on my own needs and preferences.  It felt amazing. Moon Divas at Play Fast forward ten years.  Deva and I are teaching Moon Divas workshops in a group of amazing women (like those above).  We realized that one of our universal "stories" as women is "I couldn't, I shouldn't, I can't."  

Many of us were raised to be "good" girls, who when offered something we wanted were trained to demure, "oh, I couldn't."  When faced with a sensual, spiritual or emotional decision, good girls often hear inner voices telling us we "shouldn't," that no is the only safe answer.   And when it comes to challenges that take us out of our comfort zones?  "I can't" is an answer that preserves the integrity of our good girlness and reduces risk.

No becomes a habit.  And what happens when we want to let go, to dive into the yes?  Limits, long imposed come with their own cloak of self-doubt, guilt and fear.

But what happens when we want to break the habits, shed the outworn skins, open our arms into the yes of our destiny?  What happens when we want to be this:
There are millions of models for female strength and self-sufficiency, for boldness and independence and joy available to us.  The mythosphere is bursting with archetypal images, stories and forms from many cultures where women live big and goregous on an epic scale.  From these, we may choose a persona, we may step forward into an aspect of the Divine Feminine essence and make her our own. 

We may make it a ceremony of faith, wherein we allow ourselves to live a greater story until our own grows to match.  Deva and I developed this process to help ourselves, and other Moon Divas, transcend our own limitations.

Are you ready to release your fears, to destroy old habits of acquiescence and say yes to a bigger, bolder you? Step One:  Choose Your Goddess First make some Goddess friends.  Books, cards, images, all are readily available (I have 15 in the Free Goddess Coloring Book and Self-Care Planner you could try on for size!).  Become aware of your intuitive attractions.  You may choose a Goddess at random (flipping to an image in your text of choice, picking a card from a Goddess Deck) or you can be more "intellectual" in your pursuits.  

When you have a Goddess you wish to work with, light a candle and create a sacred space in whatever way feels best to you.  Ask for the Goddess, call her name aloud, and ask her to teach you. name the qualities you wish to invoke or embody.  Invite her into the process, and offer her a token of your intentions (an object like a stone, a piece of jewelry, a ribbon or some chocolate can suffice).

Close your sacred space with gratitude and blow out your candle.  Be ready for the fun... Step Two:  Research Your Goddess Who is your Goddess?  
What does She stand for in history?
What colors does She wear?
What flavors does She prefer?
What are Her stories?

Find out as much about your Goddess as you can.  Write down your references, tape up some photos of Her.  What about her inspires you most?  What is the root of your admiration? Step Three:  Find Your Symbolic Garb When you have an idea of exactly who you wish to embody and why, you need to find your symbolic garments.  This is like the invisibility cloak, the magic wand, the ring of the queen, the sacred emblem of the Goddess.  Keep it simple so you can wear it often or keep it nearby.  For example, at the beginning of Moon Divas I was working with the Goddess Freyja to inspire my boldness.  I found a citrine pendant in the shape of a tear, following Freyja's mythic golden tears, that I wore daily for over a year.

Optional:  Get yourself a full-on Goddess costume.  Take your persona to the extreme.  Go out in public.  Feel her power!  (Oops, that's step 4!) Step 4:  Take Your Goddess Self Out On the Town It's time to put your persona to work for you.  Take your Goddess out to play.  You don't have to wear her face all of the time, unless you want to.  But when faced with a situation that brings up your fear, insecurity or couldn't/shouldn't/cant's, let her loose.

Ask yourself, what would Artemis/Freyja/Durga/Quan Yin/(Insert your Goddess here) do in this situation?

Then sit back, and allow the impulse to flow, open wide into the yes.  Let go.


A few parting tips... You may change Goddesses at any time.  Find one who is both fun and challenging to work with, and see where She takes you.

Don't give up.  Practice is the key to overcoming any habit.  Even the smallest gesture, repeated, can have great power.

Love the expression.  Let yourself play.  The Latin root of the word person is persona, or mask.  We all wear masks.  Find the one that lets your beautiful, individual light shine most brightly into the world.

Play with friends!  Goddesses love to gather.  Have a Goddess dinner party, invite your friendly Goddesses to events.  Dress up, speak the language.  Enjoy your expanding awareness of that which you already are!