It's hard to surf the waves of nausea
You always know exactly where you should be and you always feel exactly where you shouldn’t. It’s a grey, blustery day here in Montreal, accompanying the unwanted miracle of birth of wintertime…it’s after-birth of snowy white stuff, carefully strewn as if by a movie crew- is just enough to piss me off ; setting off the tripwire that sends me into a stifled rage that bemoans my present circumstances…….
. A thin patina of slush just makes the walking that much more precarious and in my current hydroceled state, with a ballsac just slightly larger than the huge dome of the Orange Julep…. I’m forced to walk like a humiliated Frankenstein, if he had just peed in his pants and was sent home from a playdate by an irate Mom
The ‘one hand giveth, one hand taketh away’ equation has morphed into the one hand ‘givetaketh’ away. To the effect where I now cringe at any good luck,as karma is a sparring partner with wrecking balls for boxing gloves and no sense of when I’m tapping out in submission…
Sleep deprived and in a constant state of nauseous erection, my emotional baggage seems to be carried in the newfound bags under my eyes…Although I had some great news this week, where I was summarily inspected by the top urologist in Montreal, between his missions of mercy to Africa to help native Women with their vaginal fistulas. In his very expert opinion, I do not have a hernia….Oh Happy Day!! The weights at the gym are overjoyed that they will soon be thrown around. However socialized medicine, such as it is, requires me to wait until January/February….an awful mess of a mental struggle to contend with.
Another great Alpo ’meat with meat byproducts’ result is that I got to tell the Mengeloid Doctor who had kept me waiting in pain since last June, to politely ‘Fuck Off’….
Not being able to do cardio in my present state, but more so the discovery of McCain’s Ultra Thin frozen pizza…has afforded the gross indulgence of putting on a ton of weight…Kris Kringle sized proportions which I can lose pretty quickly especially if I can just trigger diabetic shock…the trick is to change the voicemail greeting on a daily basis so people don’t get too nosy into my business
