If We Don’t, Who Will?

Looking up a phone number to make a phone call is beyond Joey’s ability. So is making a phone appointment, reporting to someone if he’d been mistreated, or asking someone to get something he needs. We need to care for him and open our mouths to get him what he needs. We are his advocate.

As parents, we feel as if we know our son better than any doctor, therapist, or teacher; but we’ve always listened to and appreciated the help and support they’ve given. At times, however, you know what you know, and you must be firm in demanding what you need or want for your loved one.

Here’s a few things we’ve found helpful over the past 30+ years:

· Know our roles and responsibilities – who will make calls, keep records, etc.

· Keep a notebook or 3 ring-binder, writing notes to teachers or medical personnel in it, letting others add to it, and reading and reviewing what has been written makes for better communication, provid­ing everyone uses it!

· Voice opinions but support final decisions if you are NOT the primary caregiver, whose responsibility is to listen to advice and concerns but do what was best even if others were critical of the deci­sion.

· Read all you can to become educated on health, mental, physical, spiritual, and emotional issues.

· Ask questions, seek agencies and organizations that will provide what’s needed, and keep pursuing until you find and receive the best care for the loved one in your care. Depending on your loved one’s ability to think normally, she or he will appreciate your efforts to learn about specific needs. For those lacking in the ability to think normally, you are still ahead of them as you learn to deal with them in many ways, and most importantly, that you are doing what’s right.

Proverbs 31:8-9, “Open your mouth for the dumb, for the rights of the unfortu­nate. Open your mouth, judge righteously, and defend the rights of the afflicted and needy.”