How NOT to Make a New Friend

After yesterday's post I got to thinking.  How do you go about inviting another mom out for coffee or a playdate at the park?  I have no idea.  But I do know what you SHOULDN'T say.




PIWTPITT's Top 15 Opening Lines You Should NOT Use to Meet a New Mom Friend



1.  "Would your daughter like to come over to my house for a sleepover?  My husband really enjoys little girls."



2.  "Hi, I'm Jen and this is Adolpha.  What are you doing for the rest of the day, because we'd like to hang."



3.  "Your hair is really pretty.  Can I braid it for you?"



4.  "Friday is my anniversary and I'm looking for a place for my kids to go for a sleepover that night.  Do you live close by?"



5.  "I like your pants.  What size do you wear?  Wanna trade?"



6.  "Is that your son that my son is biting?  Aww . . . Gomer loves meeting new friends."



7.  "I'm sorry, but did you just call your kid Steel?  That is the dumbest name I've ever heard."



8.  "I like your minivan.  Can I sit inside it for a while?"



9.  "You're not on a sex offender list or anything, right?  'Cause I'm totally not."



10.  "My kids are at school all day.  I just like to come to the park to meet new women."



11.  "You seem normal.  Are you normal?"



12.  "You want to invite me and my kids to lunch, but you're afraid I'll say 'No,' right?  Don't worry!  I will totally say 'Yes.'  Especially if you're paying.  Kidding!  No, I'm not."



13.  "Just think, if our kids hit it off we could share grandchildren someday."



14.  "Are your kids adopted?  They don't look anything like you."



15.  "Can I hold your baby?"





I know you have some, so let's hear them!