What Happens to a Debut Author's Brain on #Amazonfail

[Soft lights up on a small messy room. BLAKE lies sleeping fitfully on mattress with a unlikely tangle of sheets. Down stage and to the right of the bed lies THE UNIVERSE INCARNATED IN A PROTEAN PILE OF CLEANED BUT UNFOLDED LAUNDRY.:]

THE UNIVERSE INCARNATED IN A PROTEAN PILE OF CLEANED BUT UNFOLDED LAUNDRY: [quivering as it speaks:] Blake…wake up.

BLAKE: Zzzzz…mMrmmmm…zzzz.

THE UNIVERSE INCARNATED IN A PROTEAN PILE OF CLEANED BUT UNFOLDED LAUNDRY: [harshly:] Blake!

BLAKE: Zzzz…Huh? Who's there?

THE...