"I wish that we could sail our sad days away, forever, in deep blue seas of paper mache."

 In which Jack complains of Modern Scientists and Inventors. 

 I need a show of hands. How many of you have seen Back to the Future? The plot of these movies was brilliant, I could do without all the language though. Anyhow, I'm sure most everyone has seen or heard about them. About how Marty McFly traveled to 2015 and flew about on a hover board. 
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 You all know what year this is, right? And how we only have three months to 2013. Which is only two years to 2015. And we all know 2000 was the start of the future. So, we've been living in the future for 12 years. 12. Most everyone who was born in the beginning of the future is now almost a teenager. 
 You can see where I'm going with this, can't you? The future was supposed to have light sabers, and homes on Mars, and a jet in every garage, and spaceships almost in every garage. We were supposed to be traveling the stars, meeting bow tie wearing Aliens, battling Sith lords, and hanging out with Wookees. In the least we were supposed to have hover cars, or even boards.


 And Scientists have had 12 years to be working on this stuff. Okay, so you can't make a Wookee, or a Sith Lord unless you chop his arms and legs off and throw him in lava...any volunteers? BUT you CAN make light sabers, and spaceships, and homes on Mars, and HOVER BOARDS! 
 What have Scientists been up to for the last 12 years? Testing how easy it was for Gollum to bite off Frodo's finger? Was anyone even asking that question? Sure, we have cool cell phones and Ipads...but my skates don't hover, so really, I don't care. My watch doesn't have a Stark pop up computer in it. My glasses don't have Xray vision and little computer screens to tell me who are the enemy spies. And I STILL don't own a light saber to complete my sword collection. 12 years, wasted.


 If we don't have hover boards in two years, I'm packing my bags and moving to Mars. Even if there aren't any houses there yet. Who's with me?

 What do you hope we have in the future?
 Allons-y!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!