I’m not a Mommy-Blogger, but…

What do you do when your kid makes choices that you’d rather they didn’t?

I’m not talking breaking-the-law kinds of choices, (No, you may NOT smoke that joint, dear) but other, more socially acceptable kinds of choices. Like, for instance, what would you say if  your son told you he wanted to sign up for the football team?

That one’s a little trickier.

In the huddle after a big win.

I had to answer that question a few years ago. The first time he asked, he was in 2nd grade and I said NO. 7-year-olds in pads? Ridiculous. Then in 3rd grade, he asked again. This time I waited a little longer before saying NO. See, his best friend played football, and I guess there was part of me that thought there might be wisdom in letting him get it out of his system before he and his opponents were big enough to do any real damage.

We went to see his pediatrician for his yearly check-up, and I posed the question to her, fully expecting  to put the issue to bed right then and there. “Well,” she says, after giving my son a long look, “you gotta go where your passion is.”

Gee, Doc, thanks for that.

So in 4th grade, we went where his passion was and signed him up. Immediately I got to learn about the things kids’ll do to ‘make weight’ when they want to play on a team. And, supportive mother that I am, I took him on a 2-mile run the morning of the weigh-in, then didn’t give him anything to drink till after he got off the scale.

Mother Of The Year, that’s me.

Flash forward a few years, and he’s still following his passion. Last year was a wash because of a (not football related) knee injury, which he handled with an amazing amount of patience and grace. That’s making this year a little sweeter. I mean, that’s him in the picture, the one with the huge smile after Saturday’s victory. He’s in middle school now, playing on the offensive line (left guard, maybe?) and having a blast.

The teaching hospital where I work has arguably the BEST pediatric residency program in the country, which means I work with amazingly smart people every day. And they’re pediatricians-in-the-making. And when I mention that my son plays football, most of them respond pretty much like the Doc I was on with the other night. There’s a pause, a sincere and slightly concerned look, and then the question, “How do you feel about that?”

Well, Doc, I’d rather he was on swim team, but there  you go.

Every now and then I’ll run across a pediatric resident who DOESN’T get all PC and concerned, like the guy who was a UW Husky lineman as an undergraduate and might possibly be the largest human being I’ve ever had a conversation with. Nice man. Good doctor. It gives me hope. So does the fact that my son says that after high school he’s done with football.

As long as he gets through without any major damage, I’m good with that.

I can think of career choices that I’d struggle with, along with various high-risk extra-curricular  activities that I can see him getting into when he gets older. He’s a pretty good piano player, which might seem like a safe hobby, except do  you KNOW what goes on in bars at night? I’ve been in bands myself, and the drugs and the alcohol…

Okay, have to stop here or go crazy.

I guess when it comes down to it, there is no SAFE. As a kids sport, soccer gets all the love, despite the high rate of knee & ankle injuries and concussions. Yeah, football’s dangerous, but so are a lot of other things. The trick is to know which risks you’re willing to take.

So do you let your kid play football, or not?

Peace,

Liv

Gratuitous close-up of the Himalayan Honeysuckle in bloom out back, just because it’s so cool.