Resident Evil: Retribution

You might reasonably ask why I would go to see this movie, particularly given its current RottenTomatoes critics rating of 30%. I have several answers:
Milla JovovichMichelle RodriguezI've seen all the others (yes, really)Michelle RodriguezMilla Jovovichkinda-sorta zombie-ish bad thingsmuch shit goes boomHere are things I do not expect when I walk into a theater showing a Resident Evil flick:
a plot that makes any kind of sense whatsoeverphysics or any other science actually workingMilla Jovovich's actual face (as opposed to the increasingly heavily altered simulation of it that appears on her bodyenough of Michelle Rodriguez (although, to be fair, is that even possible?)zombie-ish bad things that obey any set of consistent rulesacting--forget good acting; you can't go to one of these expecting any actingmediocre or better writing on any frontHaving armed you with my reasons and the many things I do not expect, I can now give you this very simple review:

If you want to see this film for the same reasons I do, and if you are willing to abandon all hope for any of the things I do not expect, then you will enjoy this movie.

As, for the most part, I did.

If, however, you do not fit this profile, I suggest you stay home and catch up on your reading, or your DVR'd TV shows, or your saved-up DVDs, or your overdue toenail clipping.  Whatever.