Hardship is Good?

Friends of ours in an Asian land shared this thought:

People here love rice, but because of the shortage of land, someone developed a way to grow rice underground. Somewhere under the world’s largest city, they grow rice. Initially, the rice did not have much flavor. The reason, they discovered, was because the rice was not exposed to the elements outside – the scorching heat, the strong winds, and the summer downpours. So they began to simulate the weather outside. No matter what we might be going through right now, the heat and wind have a purpose – to make us ‘tastier!’

In making a correlation to my own life, I can say that most of us want life to be easy, comfortable, happy and without a lot of effort! Yet, what makes us more useful and “tastier” if you will, is when the “elements” of life have their way with us.

We’ll all be “called” to overcome, endure, or work through some very challenging situation(s) at some time in our life. For some, the duration from start to finish will vary. We’d all love for our challenge to be short-lived; but in our challenge, although equally our joy, is now over 31 years old!

Raising a child with special needs (mental retardation – some prefer the term mentally disabled, cerebral palsy, epilepsy, and some severe/fatal allergies) demands of us 24/7 attention and focus. It has required of me to make it a full time job without financial reward: finding services, jobs, doctors, specialists, etc. It often brings us to our limit of patience. It tends to be one reason for a divorce rate of greater than 85% in this group labeled “special needs families”. It has made me mad, strong, sad, happy, frustrated, joyous, and in the end, always thankful. But, many days are hard.

Nights on end when a typical child is ill are draining, but when special needs are added to the mix, it can be a different type of challenge. Children who can’t talk can’t share their pain or needs. Maybe they need a diaper changed and they’re a teen. This is just one avenue of hardship – others include:

· family members who don’t understand and don’t that the time to understand

· dealing with agencies, the law, schools, workshops, etc.

· hours of study to find places our child will thrive

· hours of phone calling and travel to get what we know they need

· …and knowing they will never be able to do any of this on their own.

The scorching heat of hardship allows us to learn lessons we wouldn’t otherwise learn, and if we weather those hardships, we can become an example to others. I’ve sensed God working in my life through the challenges. When sadness and disappointment come like a strong wind, we recognize God’s purpose for all the things He brings into our lives – just what we need to grow and well, become “tastier”.

He has comforted me and in turn, I comfort and mentor younger moms challenged as I have been – helping them see the broader scope – the bigger picture: maybe this is about what we will learn, how we will grow, how we will love. If God stood before me and offered to heal my son, I’d probably say no. WHY? Because I’ve learned that from the hardships have come much good:

· I know God better

· I was blessed to be able to help my child on a full time basis: able to be at home full time, healthy to do what was needed

· I have a strong marriage

· We’ve met many wonderful people traveling the same road as us – giving, loving, kind and generous people who sacrifice their lives to make another life better

· That others (and the Lord) have comforted me, I’ve been able to comfort others in return

Hardships are good, and I’ll be satisfied to stick with the ones I have.