Try It You Might Like It

I'm a little different than most people when it comes to sex. I guess that should be expected or I wouldn't be writing the types of stories I do. But what makes me really different is I don't have a kneejerk reaction to things. I believe in giving everything a try. I don't mean physically, just mentally. And I don't mean everything. I'm not talking about things like pedophilia. But anything that you could do with another consenting adult should be on the fantasy table.

It is easy for us to be dismissive of the fetishes of others. I used to be that way too. But at some point I realized that we all have fetishes, and there isn't much that separates the ones we like from the ones we don't. So now I do my best to at least try to imagine something before I dismiss it. Sometimes that goes poorly (I just can't get past the smell factor for certain fetishes) and sometimes it goes well (maybe the idea of pegging is a little hot).

The key is recognizing that your fantasy limits can be way different than your real limits. There are things that are incredibly sexy to read about that you would never go near in real life. For some couples, any type of adultery fits that bill. There is nothing wrong with fantasizing about men other than your husband. There is nothing wrong with reading stories about sleeping with the hot personal trainer at your gym. But when you can no longer separate fantasy from reality, you have problems. In a healthy relationship you should be able to share your fantasies with your partner because that's all they are, fantasies.

I'll grant that I'm not perfect, and that I need a little realism thrown into stories when I read them. Anytime a man just rams it in a woman's ass with no lube, I cringe. I just don't see why the writer can't take a few seconds to acknowledge biological reality on that one. The anus isn't self-lubricating, and the lubing process can be pretty sexy in and of itself. Some people might think that in a story where a man is just taking what he wants then that's a little different, but then I just wonder if it would actually be any good for the man either. I'm as guilty of overthinking as the rest of the world, even when I try not to be.

So I'm encouraging all my readers to not be so dismissive of another persons' fantasy. Try it on for yourself, spin around in front of a mirror a few times, and see if it fits you better than you thought. Expanding your fantasy universe is a good thing.