The Real Reason for the Zombie Craze
What’s up with all the zombies?I hear this question a lot. As the author of successful zombie novels, people seem to think that I have an explanation for this phenomenon.
There are a number of philosophies on why zombies are so popular. Some people think it is because the economy of the planet has been struggling for so long (regardless of your political bent, everyone seems to agree that the economy could improve), and thus the zombie apocalypse is actually a metaphor for the collapse of society and the inevitable brutality of humanity when the system comes apart. Some people think that the zombies represent the corporate interests, with their mindless desire to consume those that feed their coffers. Some believe that zombies are really representative of the current state of the world, with its uncaring willingness to allow the downfall of its neighbors while looking out for numero uno. And then there are those who feel that zombies are a caricature for rampant consumerism.
I like writing about zombies because I want to explore what I call “the end of the infrastructure.” What happens when all the niceties that modern civilization provides go away: Roads, electricity, the Internet, clean water, abundant food, safe medicines (although there are many who would argue that the medicines aren’t safe to begin with), opportunities to succeed and become wealthy (or at least keep the bill collectors at bay)? I depend on all of that and more. I’m not an ex-Navy SEAL with a cache of weapons, the ability to kick above my head and pilot anything from a motorcycle to a helicopter to a tank, and a panic room with a years supply of food, a big screen TV with requisite Wii, and four foot thick steel walls, so I’m going to be in a lot of trouble when the apocalypse comes. I’m much more likely to end up as an extra in zombie horde scene than as the hero. So I spend a lot of time thinking about how ordinary people with ordinary skills could survive in a world without infrastructure. Frankly, it scares the [expletive] out of me!
But that’s not what I think is “up with all the zombies.”
No, my hypothesis is that the zombie craze is just a smokescreen for the inevitable robot uprising.
I’m serious. Robots taking over the world is a lot more likely than the advent of zombies. Hell, robots are everywhere. You get your money from them (ATM machines), you buy movie tickets from them, they wash your car, they even sell you groceries. What, you didn’t realize that the self-checkout at the grocery store is actually a robot? You were probably picturing Gort from The Day The Earth Stood Still (“Clatu beratta nicto!”), or Arnold Schwarzenegger in any one of the Terminator movies, or Yul Brynner in Westworld, or even that lovable pair, C-3PO and R2-D2 from the Star Wars franchise. But that’s all science-fiction, kind of like the zombies. And while they do have humanoid robots out there, they’re not the ones to be concerned with. Predator drones armed with Hellfire missiles and set on autopilot while the guy in the trailer in Wisconsin goes to take a leak… That’s what you should be worried about.
See, robots exist, and they are getting smarter. Someone out there, right now, is working on a self-programming expert system—what most people call an Artificial Intelligence (AI). Pretty soon, they’re going to come up with a system that can not only pass a Turing test, but also defeat a captcha, one of those little scrambled combinations of letters and numbers, both of which are supposed to prove that you are a human and not a robot. The likelihood of sentient silicon-based AI is far greater than the probability of dead flesh reanimating and seeking to consume us all with untold malice. Zombies are the poor man’s Frankenstein’s monster. Robots are exploring Mars right now. Think about that.
When I say the inevitable robot uprising, I’m not really picturing a situation like in The Matrix or Terminator movies, with an active hostility or even open war between the two camps. I’m picturing something more along the lines of H.G. Wells’ The Time Machine, where humans are the Eloi, and the robots are the Morlocks. In that story, the Eloi were complacent in their dependence on the Morlocks for their lifestyles, and complicit in allowing the Morlocks to devour them like cattle.
Zombie stories focus around strong, well-trained, motivated people who, in dire circumstances, rise above the worst possible scenario and triumph, while the weak join the ranks of the enemy and suffer eternal damnation. Zombie stories are inherently empowering.
The robots, on the other hand, sap our strength as humans. Robots are not, as Douglas Adams once put it, “Your plastic pal who’s fun to be with!” They are machines designed to do the work of a man. They are conveniences that allow humans to concentrate on intellectual endeavors—which sounds pretty good until you realize how dependent we are on those conveniences. Dealing with robots rarely requires use of a shotgun, crowbar, or chainsaw. When the robots take over, we may not even have those tools to use. It’s pretty scary stuff.
Now, don’t misunderstand me. I’m not a Luddite who is against technology and advocates going back to a simpler time when we grew our own food and lived off the land. Like I said, I rely on the infrastructure of the modern world to make a living and stay healthy. And I’m not a character in an Isaac Asimov story, with an overplayed Frankenstein complex and a desire to enslave those that I fear.
But the next time you pick up a zombie novel, remember that the lesson of the zombies is to be strong and to fight to keep yourself and your loved ones from becoming a statistic. And the next time you go through the self-checkout line at the grocery, say hello to the real threat.
I, for one, do not welcome our new robot overlords.
[Apologies to Ashley Stroupe. -SB]
