I Can’t Comprehend Time

I wonder if I’m alone in this? One of the things I’ve been doing since Buddy died is obsessing about all the decisions I made about his care and what I could have done differently. It’s insane but it’s a common response to death.

Then I thought, ‘What if I had somehow managed to buy him a couple more months?’ Let’s say it’s October and he’s just died. What would I have gained? What would he have gained? I think it would feel like those two months never happened. Don’t get me wrong, I would give anything for two more months, I’m just saying that had I gotten them, in October I would not be appreciating them, I’d be exactly where I am now.

The only response is what we’re always told to do: appreciate the moment you have now. IE, in October, those two months wouldn’t do me any good. But they would have been great as they happened.

A Ted Talk that made me feel happy for a few minutes.

Some photographs that blew my mind for a few minutes.

Yesterday I asked Finney, “Who’s the cutest cat in the whole wide world?” In the past, whenever I’ve asked him this I always followed it with, “You are! Tied with Buddy, of course.” But yesterday it was just, “You are.”