Toilet wins every time

Years ago, on the way to Florida, my best friend and I played the "Best of All-Time" game, in which competitors must argue for the best of all-time in a variety of categories. Movies. Books. Dictators. Handheld kitchen appliances. Pick-up lines. You name it.

When it came to Best Invention of All-Time, my buddy said, "Indoor plumbing" without the slightest hesitation. In a game of hemming and hawing, qualifying and justifying, an answer this instantaneous is rare. My initial reaction was...