lawrencegullo:
I’ve never seen/read it - but this is what I’ve...
I’ve never seen/read it - but this is what I’ve gathered from my friends who have. (I am so deeply sorry)
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M’colleague: So there are different major families all feuding for the throne, and there are the Starks, and they’re all like WE LIVE IN THE NORTH AND HAVE WOLVES FOR PETS AND WINTER IS COMING ARGABLARGHHH
Our Hero: can i just be a pimp or something? A fishmonger?
M’colleague: no it’s all fantasyland and everyone is dragons. It’s like Skyrim but with sex
Our Hero: but surely there are pimps and fishmongers to serve the ax wielding aristocrats and dragons, no?
M’colleague: NO
EVERYONE IS DRAGONS
OR DIREWOLVES
OR THE NIGHT’S WATCH WHO ALL WEAR BLACK AND EVERYONE IS LIKE LOL YOU GUYS PATROL THE WALL THAT SEPARATES US FROM THE FOREST WHERE THE GHOST LIVE WE THINK WE ARE PRETTY SCARED OF THEM
and the Night Guard or whatever they are called are like “..okay :( ”
…this is like the blind leading the deaf
Our Hero: I somehow understand less than before… are there actually dragons or no?
M’colleague: there totes are!! that’s another family. the targablarghians or whatever.
targaryens? i dunno
they have dragons
and are dragons
like, you can’t burn them with fire
or something
and harry lloyd plays one of them in the show! he’s a horrible blond
Our Hero: they do have wenches, right? i mean…
M’colleague: yes
wenches
wenches everywhere
Our Hero: I don’t see how they could possibly call themselves fantasy if there are no wenches
M’colleague: nope, yeah, wenches
Our Hero: wenches but no pimps or fishmongers? fucking anarchy, no wonder everyone’s scrambling to lead the government
