Promo: What works? What doesn't?

As a bottom of the list author who has to pay for promotion, it's hard to decided what works and what doesn't. Over the years, I've given away more gadgets with my logo & website on them than I could possibly count, not to mention the wads of cash these things have cost. Yet, I still don't know what works. What item catches the reader's attention enough to make them check out your website and hopefully purchase your books?
It's an ongoing struggle to figure this out. I want to hitch my wagon to the promo horse that will place my stuff in everyone's hands world wide. I want to be the next "Fifty Shades" but better written with amazingly believable characters, plot and sex scenes. Do you think the person that wrote that book went around passing out pens and bookmarks at readers events trying to get noticed? I highly doubt it.
Did she just get lucky? Nope. I don't think that's it either. I think she hit the promotional jackpot. But how?

I'm opening up the discussion for what you believe works and what doesn't in the world of bottom and mid-list authors. How do we become A-list, got-to-have authors? What promo do you believe will make us stand out in the crowd? What item have you collected at a reader's event that you've kept and used and gone to the author's website because of it? What do you throw away without even reading the promo?

I look forward to your feedback.
Thanks,
Tara Nina
 www.taranina.com