These are not New Year Resolutions

I don't believe in new year resolutions. If you're going to do something, just get on and fucking do it. Don't wait for a new year to roll around, or hang some extra importance on it because it was a promise you made to yourself on the 1st day of the year. Get some personal conviction, ya loser.

However, here are my new year reso… Wait. Here are some things I hope to achieve this year.

On January 2nd, 2010 I received one rejection for a short story I'd written and one acceptance for a...