Method A and Method B

Method A. After soothing your baby for several minutes, you always put your baby down to sleep, whether she is or is not yet asleep. Your goal is to put your baby down drowsy but awake. The soothing is a wind-down transition from light to dark, active to quiet, alert to drowsy, soothing may include breast or bottle-feeding. Result: Your baby learns how to soothe herself to sleep without being held. This allows your baby to fall asleep by herself in a crib.

If you approve of this method, you may use positive judgmental terms such as independence, learning self soothing skills or acquiring the capacity to be alone. If you disapprove of this method, you may use negative judgmental terms such as unnatural, insecurity, abandonment, neglect, or controlling.

Method B. You always hold or rock your baby until he is in a deep sleep. You may then lie down with your baby, hold your baby during his nap, or put him down only after he is in a deep sleep.

Result: Your baby learns to associate the process of falling asleep with your breast as a pillow, your body rhythm, and your body odor or a swing. Your baby may have difficulty falling asleep by himself in his crib.

If you approve of this method, you may use positive judgmental terms such as natural, security, 24-hour parenting. If you disapprove of this method, you may use negative judgmental terms such as dependence, spoiling.

One method is not better than another; therefore, there is no reason to use these judgmental terms.

Be decisive, choose a method of soothing style, and be consistent. There is no right or wrong Method, bur consistency helps your baby sleep well because the process of falling asleep is learned behavior. Frequently switching between Method A and Method B confuses your baby and interferes with your baby learning how to nap. Parents and baby-sitters should what is comfortable for them, but they should be consisten in the Method that they use.

Advice: Method A is more likely to work if you start early (as soon as you come home from the hospital), if the intervals of wakefulness are brief (before a second wind develops), especially in the morning after only one hour of wakefulness, and fathers or others are involved in the soothing process. But Method B still might be needed in the evening around 6 weeks after the due date when fussiness peaks. At 6 weeks then, consistency might be thought of as Method A during the day and Method B at bedtime.

Advice: If you have more than one child, it is very difficult to consistently use Method B. Therefore, please consider employing Method A. An exception might be if you have full-time help.

Advice: Most first-time parents initially find Method B more comfortable, but they do not anticipate that later, when the baby is bigger or when they want to do other things during naps, their baby will have to learn Method A. Switching from Method B to Method A may be stressful for you and your baby and involve some crying, or your baby might make the change without any difficulty at all.

Advice: Parents of colicky babies initially find Method B to be easier because colicky babies are more wakeful and more irregular than other babies. This means that it is harder for these babies to settle down to sleep unassisted and it is harder for their parents to predict those times when they need to sleep. This usually results in prolonged soothing efforts and if parents try to switch methods later, it may be very stressful to the entire family. I think that when families have the resources (heroic efforts or extra hands) to help a colicky baby stay fairly well rested, then the switch from method B to Method A around 3-4 months of age is easier. You may try Method A throughout the day, but you may abandon your efforts during a well-defined wakeful or fussy period in the evening until the baby is 3-4 months of age. During a fussy period, do whatever works best to soothe your baby.

Marc

Filed under: Uncategorized