WEED WHACKING

Happy first day of summer northern hemisphere!! Sorry about the winter southern hemisphere.

It is sunny and hot in Laguna Beach today. Semi-nude girls and super-hot surfers have come out of hibernation. Below my window I hear flip-flop slaps and skateboard wheels grinding against the asphalt. In my office I hear the non-stop clacking of my keyboard and the crack-crack-crack of my neck.

Kevy said the neck thing is my fault because my purse is too heavy.

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I say it’s the planet’s fault because Earth is tilting today (Google: Summer Solstice) and that tilt is making my bag feel heavier than it is.

He said there’s no way I need half the stuff that’s in there.

I insist that I do.

And then my neck cracks some more and I have to wonder.

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1) What do I have in my bag?

2) Where do the semi-nude girls keep their smoothie money?

I am unable to investigate #2 without risking arrest. But #1 is easy.

I dumped it all out.

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1. 3 pair of glasses (reading, tinted for computer, sunglasses.)

2. Flip flops

3. Notebook in case I have any brilliant ideas.

4. Four pens in case I have so many brilliant ideas I run out of ink four times.

5. Almonds aplenty. Enough to feed the entire US Olympic team. Coaches too.

6. Headphones.

7. Phone.

8. Car keys. House Keys.

9. Office keys with a separate wallet that holds the cards that don’t fit in my main wallet.

10. Main wallet.

11. 4 lip quenchers. (2 balm, 2 gloss)

12. Cuticle cream because I pick.

13. 3 nail polishes should I ever have  time to go to a nail salon and said nail salon does not offer polish.

14. Soggy Trader Joe’s seaweed.

15. Rescue Remedy Spray – a holistic spray that’s supposed to calm you down. (Doesn’t work!)

16. Pill case filled with various kinds of aspirin.

17. 3 packs of gum.

18. Make up case. (FYI I have never reapplied my makeup during the day. NEVER!)

19. Hand cream.

20. Two hard shell glasses cases.

Hmmmm. Maybe Kevy had a point. Could my excessive load (along with the earth’s tilt, of course) have something to do with my neck cracks? There was only one way to find out.

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TOSS THE SEAWEED

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Ahhhh. Much Better.

Happy Summer!!!

TTYW,

Lisi