The Hidden Cost of Endless Energy: Why My Drive Isn’t What It Seems

People ask me all the time: “How do you have so much energy?” What people witness is me summoning everything I’ve got to hype and prop myself up, to deliver in the moments when it counts.

They see me on back-to-back calls, in strategy sessions, leading teams, creating processes, and doing everything in my power to inspire, motivate, and make a difference. They see the high-octane Carson Heady who seems unstoppable.

I don’t have an over-abundance of energy. In fact, most days, I’m exhausted.

I grew up in the school of never let them see you bleed. I trained myself for decades to mask the fatigue and hide the pain.

But underneath the surface, I’m often hurting. Decades of pushing, overworking my body, and carrying the weight of expectation have left scars that coffee and adrenaline alone can’t erase.

Behind every “energetic” moment, there are hours of wrestling with pain, cynicism, and doubt.

I’ve been cast out at critical moments in my life. I’ve been discarded, overlooked, betrayed, and deeply wounded by people I once thought were my friends—people I thought cared about me, my well-being, or my accomplishments.

I’ve spent far too much of my life trying to prove I was worthy of their love, chasing approval that never came.

The ghosts of those letdowns still linger, whispering imposter syndrome into my ear at the most inconvenient times.

So when people ask where my energy comes from, it’s not because I feel invincible. It’s because I’ve learned how to manufacture it when I need to.

I’ve learned how to create a character—Carson V. Heady, the guy who never flinches, never falters, never bleeds—even when inside, I feel all of those things and more.

Energy, motivation, happiness—these are not permanent states. They’re choices. Investments. Daily battles.

Success is fleeting, and the pressure to replicate it never ends.

I’ve been blessed with a lot of wins. From nine-figure deals to books that found an audience, to raising a family I love dearly—I have everything I could ever want.

And yet, that doesn’t guarantee happiness in every moment.

Because happiness isn’t a destination. Energy isn’t infinite. Both require constant recalibration, intentional balance, and the discipline to separate what truly matters from the noise our algorithms spoon-feed us every day.

My energy is real. But it doesn’t come easy.

It’s real because I love what I do.

It’s real because I believe God put me here for a reason—even if I don’t always understand it.

It’s real because I see my talents not as possessions, but as responsibilities.

Every day, I make the choice to get back up, to channel whatever I have left into serving, inspiring, and making a difference for someone—anyone—who might need it.

The show must go on.

Where does YOUR energy really come from—and are you investing it where it matters most?