The Weight of Words
Frequency illusion. Also known as Baader–Meinhof phenomenon (a free copy of one of my ebooks goes to any reader who knows which of my books features Baader–Meinhof phenomenon).
Frequency illusion is a cognitive bias in which a person notices a specific concept, word, or product more frequently after recently becoming aware of it.
I don't know if my notice of the above quote was a case of frequency illusion, or if it was just my good luck to read it (although the reason this quote has been circulated recently is a sad one - namely the death of the poet who wrote it).
The fact is, I've been contemplating quitting social media. To a certain extent, I've been thinking of quitting since the moment I opened my accounts ... but the impulse has been much stronger lately, for a number of reasons:
- Scrolling social media really does waste my time - time I could be spending writing. So there's that.
- The particular accounts I want to quit are Meta accounts - for the sake of brevity, let's just call Meta "problematic" - essentially, I'm not sad at the thought of detaching from them.
- It's such a heavy time for so many people, groups, and countries right now - and while I do think it's important to follow and understand the news, I want to do that in a responsible way. By reading reputable, fact-checked sources. By avoiding the biased (and often untrue) clickbait that gets posted on social media.
The most important reason, though, is the lack of civility and kindness I've been increasingly seeing. I used to be fairly successful at avoiding this by being careful about who I follow and what I read ... but it's really spilled over. The final straw was the "Ferry update" group I joined to get information about the Wolfe Island ferry. What should be an information-based, non-confrontational group is regularly laced with insult-slinging - people being told they're "not real Islanders" or to "shut up." That group has affected the way I see other people in my community, and not in a good way.
The bottom line is I've been feeling more strongly that it's time to cut ties. I've had to overcome my own objections of "I need the information" and "I need an author presence." The first one is easy - unfortunately, I'm no longer able to get clear, factual, conflict-free information from social media. My return to school made the second one simpler too - I haven't been nurturing my author presence on social media ... and things have been just fine.
Then I saw the above quote and something clicked. Because, really, it's just that simple. How do I want to be spending my time and energy? I want my attention to be on the people and things I love, rather than going down rabbit holes reading about people who don't love the people and things I do (and probably wouldn't like me much if they knew me).
What's the point of this message? Well, there are three:
1) Words have so much power. They have the power to hurt and harm (and I'm seeing too many of those words on social media), and they have the power to inspire and change (which is what Andrea Gibson's words did for me). I'll be writing more about words and their power in future newsletter and on my blog.
2) I want to stay in touch with all of you! As long as you're on my newsletter list, we'll be connected. I'm also spending time on Pinterest. Maybe I'll see you there?
3) And my main point - I'd love to hear about your experience with words that have pushed or pulled you to do something. A saying you have pinned on a bulletin board where you can see it, or scribbled somewhere important. Words you repeat to yourself. I'd love it if you'd share with me!
We're partway through August - for most of you this is summer - I hope you're enjoying it, spending time with the people you want to. I hope you're able to have your attention on loving.
Frequency illusion is a cognitive bias in which a person notices a specific concept, word, or product more frequently after recently becoming aware of it.
I don't know if my notice of the above quote was a case of frequency illusion, or if it was just my good luck to read it (although the reason this quote has been circulated recently is a sad one - namely the death of the poet who wrote it).
The fact is, I've been contemplating quitting social media. To a certain extent, I've been thinking of quitting since the moment I opened my accounts ... but the impulse has been much stronger lately, for a number of reasons:
- Scrolling social media really does waste my time - time I could be spending writing. So there's that.
- The particular accounts I want to quit are Meta accounts - for the sake of brevity, let's just call Meta "problematic" - essentially, I'm not sad at the thought of detaching from them.
- It's such a heavy time for so many people, groups, and countries right now - and while I do think it's important to follow and understand the news, I want to do that in a responsible way. By reading reputable, fact-checked sources. By avoiding the biased (and often untrue) clickbait that gets posted on social media.
The most important reason, though, is the lack of civility and kindness I've been increasingly seeing. I used to be fairly successful at avoiding this by being careful about who I follow and what I read ... but it's really spilled over. The final straw was the "Ferry update" group I joined to get information about the Wolfe Island ferry. What should be an information-based, non-confrontational group is regularly laced with insult-slinging - people being told they're "not real Islanders" or to "shut up." That group has affected the way I see other people in my community, and not in a good way.
The bottom line is I've been feeling more strongly that it's time to cut ties. I've had to overcome my own objections of "I need the information" and "I need an author presence." The first one is easy - unfortunately, I'm no longer able to get clear, factual, conflict-free information from social media. My return to school made the second one simpler too - I haven't been nurturing my author presence on social media ... and things have been just fine.
Then I saw the above quote and something clicked. Because, really, it's just that simple. How do I want to be spending my time and energy? I want my attention to be on the people and things I love, rather than going down rabbit holes reading about people who don't love the people and things I do (and probably wouldn't like me much if they knew me).
What's the point of this message? Well, there are three:
1) Words have so much power. They have the power to hurt and harm (and I'm seeing too many of those words on social media), and they have the power to inspire and change (which is what Andrea Gibson's words did for me). I'll be writing more about words and their power in future newsletter and on my blog.
2) I want to stay in touch with all of you! As long as you're on my newsletter list, we'll be connected. I'm also spending time on Pinterest. Maybe I'll see you there?
3) And my main point - I'd love to hear about your experience with words that have pushed or pulled you to do something. A saying you have pinned on a bulletin board where you can see it, or scribbled somewhere important. Words you repeat to yourself. I'd love it if you'd share with me!
We're partway through August - for most of you this is summer - I hope you're enjoying it, spending time with the people you want to. I hope you're able to have your attention on loving.
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