On Speeches, Part II
It might be almost a year since my own wedding but that doesn’t mean I’m done with writing speeches.
I write this in a state of good-natured fatigue, having spent last night carousing merrily at a friend’s wedding: much dancing, much drinking, much delight all round. I am now somewhat delicate, but when one is offered cocktails named after one’s friends’ golden retriever, one simply does not decline.
But I wasn’t just partying – I had a job to do. Or rather we had a job to do. Or rather we each had multiple jobs to do besides the one that we had to do together. My wife, being a bridesmaid, had quite a lot more to do than I, but being handy with a microphone I was also press-ganged into various bits of odd announcement and that sort of thing. But for the most important job we shared that mic, because we had a speech to deliver. A speech we co-wrote, a speech which was full of as much love and respect as we could squeeze into it. A speech which had some fairly stiff competition, given that we went last out of five, and were already up against the magnificent personal vows that the happy couple had already made.
A speech which went down very well, thankfully – it’s almost like having two professional writers for friends is quite handy when you’re in need of some good words.
It was odd, though, writing that speech, because I was obviously thinking about this time (ish) last year when I was writing my own wedding speech. A speech similarly crammed with as much love and respect as possible, just in different ways; a speech delivered to my wife and not alongside her. A speech where the pressure of getting it right was crucial to someone else’s day and not our own. And we did get it right, and they did have a wonderful day, and all was and is very well indeed. But it’s a strange feeling, still, baring your heart in that way for the people you love. I enjoy it. It’s worth it every time for the look on their faces.
And I’m not done. I have another wedding coming up, in a bit over a month; another wedding for which I must co-write a speech, for I am one of the best men/people/beings. This speech may have to strike, at least in part, a somewhat different tone: obviously we love the groom dearly, and we will make damn sure he knows that, but he is also the groom, and we are the best people, and we must therefore first subject him to at least a gentle level of mockery. He expects nothing less, and so we shall deliver.
Writing speeches I find stressful; delivering them I find a joy. I am a writer: I am no stranger to descriptions and praise and jokes and all that which goes into a speech. I am no stranger to writing speeches of all kinds. But the speeches I normally write are for other characters’ mouths, are about their loved (or hated) ones. It’s a different prospect to write one for me to say myself, about people who are really there and really matter. My fictional characters will forgive an accidental insult – my friends will not.
But it’s so worth the doing, if it makes them happy. And I’m at 2/2 so far on that front, so let’s go for 3, shall we?
